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JOSIE
Four Years Ago
The sounds of shouting float up into my bedroom room, and I jump to my feet in excitement. I drape my towel over my shoulder and run down the stairs, sliding across the floor as the doormat flicks up behind me. I hit the doorframe and steady myself before barrelling down the steps.
Nick, John, Eric, and my best friend Elise, are piled in the car. Nick hangs out the window, beckoning me to him. I tear down the driveway and throw myself into the car.
Elise’s long, bronze hair flaps in the wind. She leans back, her fingers scraping mine, hers littered with dainty silver rings.
We pull up at the local quarry, delighted to find we have the place to ourselves. The boys race towards the water while we girls start layering on sunscreen.
“Hey,” Elise says, rummaging through her bag before holding something out to me.
“What’s this?” I ask, taking it from her and unwrapping the tissue paper.
She shrugs, tucking a piece of her long hair behind her ear. “Something I made. One for me, one for you.”
Trailing my finger over it, I smile down at the bracelet. It’s thin and delicate, feeling weightless in my hand. The word ‘best friend’ is engraved on it.
“I love it.” I beam at her, reaching my arm around her and pulling her towards me for a brief hug. I used to make us all sorts of arts and crafts items that declared our close friendship. It warmed my heart to see her do it in return all these years later.
“We must always wear it,” she points a finger at me, “to remind ourselves we will always have each other. Despite everything else that happens.”
“Deal.”
Our hands meet in our signature handshake and then we finish spreading the sunscreen over our skin.
The scorching sun beats down on my back as I rush over to the rocks, the grass blades tickling my feet. I toss my towel to the ground and yank my dress over my head.
Elise does the same with her shirt, and I stare in envy at her cut-off denim shorts hanging loosely on her hips, her bones sticking out. I wish I were that thin.
Nick’s brawny arms fold around me, and I squeal when my feet lift off the ground. I hate that my immediate thought is that I would be heavier than her when the boys messed around with us, throwing us over their shoulders. I love Elise—so much—but I’m also extremely envious of basically everything about her.
He whirls me around, my hair sticking to my face from the sweat. I bounce over his shoulder with each step, and then suddenly, icy cold water explodes over my body. I inhale sharply and when I emerge, I’m spluttering, my chest burning. Nick laughs loudly, and I splash him with water.
John and Eric fight over Elise’s attention. She has such an effortlessness about her. A charm that lures everyone in. Peeling my eyes from her, I settle on Nick, who is watching his friends with a toothy grin on his face.
Nerves bubble in my stomach as I move towards him. Nick and I have been together for a while now. We’d kissed a lot, hugged, and held hands, but I wanted more.Neededmore. Elise had lost her virginity a year ago to Brennon, one of the hottest guys in our school. It had led to a flirty on-and-off-again type relationship over the last year, and there have been others since. Then there’s me, little old virgin, even though I’m the only one to have had a boyfriend this long.
I press my hip to his side and slide my hands around him. He smiles, letting me wrap my legs around his waist. I press my lips to his. The kiss is slippery and cold, and my heart is thundering. He pulls back after a moment—like always—but I move to kiss him again. I press my hips into him harder, my hand running down his chest.
My hand sinks lower. He pulls away from me sharply, and I stumble, my foot slipping. My head goes under the water and Nick quickly reaches for me, pulling me back up.
“What the hell?” he hisses, his eyes darting to our oblivious friends who are busy splashing and tackling each other.
A hot blush floods my cheeks, down my neck, and across my chest.
“Um,” I stammer. “I thought … maybe you’d … like that.”
Nick looks at me like I’ve lit a bible on fire. He shakes his head.
“No. Not until we are married.”
My mouth is dry as I stare at him. He has mentioned this before, but I pretend he didn’t. I didn’t want to be the only virgin left in Fern Grove.
“Nick—” I try to reach for him, but he shrugs me off and moves towards our friends. He is soon laughing and joining in, acting as though nothing happened between us just now.
I swim back to the rocks and climb up. In a huff, I collapse onto my towel and glare up at the clouds. I am humiliated. Nick rejected me.Again.
