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I was brutally honest with her, but she had no idea the wicked cruelty that existed in this world. I wanted to plant the idea but not taint her with the gory details.
“So then by killing these people, you’re actually saving lives? Innocent people, including children, are spared because you got rid of the men,people, who victimize them?”
One corner of my mouth ticked upward. She was still trying to find the good in my actions. I couldn’t fault her for that. On the surface, it was exactly the way she portrayed it.
But I knew better.
“Don’t try to paint me as a hero, Noemi. It’s not like that.”
I couldn’t tell her that I enjoyed my work. I couldn’t admit that with the first contract I accepted at the age of sixteen, I was lucky that I’d found a way to take my twisted rage out on people no one would ever miss.
We started walking again. She was quiet. I could almost hear her mind working, grinding through everything I said. Thinking. Analyzing. Trying to find something redeeming. Connecting the dots.
But she wouldn’t be able to. She didn’t have all the pieces of the puzzle, the jigsaw of what my soul should have been.
The sun continued its descent, leaving the sky awash with the reds, golds, and yellows of a tropical sunset. We continued walking in silence until Noemi grabbed my arm.
“When you and Michael were talking, you said that you didn’t think the events of the last few days were about you. Is that why you’re telling me all this now? Someone’s trying... me? This is about me? Who would want to kill me? I don’t understand, Dante—”
Our conversation triggered her memory. Her bottom lip quivered as fear took over. I reached for her, knowing that my arms could give her the comfort that my words couldn’t, because, the fuck if I had any answers to give her.
Her arms wrapped around my waist as naturally as if we spent every evening in this position. Her head bowed against my chest and I rested my cheek on the top of her head.
“I’m working on it, baby girl. If I had answer—”
“You wouldn’t tell me,” she finished for me in a huff.
“You’re right. About saving your life, no, I won’t tell you.”
“But it’s my life,” she grumbled. “How am I supposed to live it knowing that someone else is trying to end it?”
“Listen to me,” I grated in her ear, angered again, not by her fear, but by the audacity someone had to threaten her, to instill that fear in her to begin with. “I’m not certain yet that what I said to Michael is accurate. It was just a thought. Even if it’s not true, I’m not going to let anything happen to you. I think I’ve proven that already. You’re with me. You’re perfectly safe, you understand?”
“But what about... after?”
We hadn’t talked about after. I knew she wanted more than just one night, just one week, with me. I’d known that from the beginning, though she hadn’t mentioned it. If I made the offer, she’d take it, but it wasn’t going to happen, and she had enough self-preservation and self-respect not to bring it up. I couldn’t say anything that would get her hopes up; couldn’t lead her to believe this week was anything more than a means to an end, even though I knew that was a damn lie.
This week waseverything.Shewas everything. My beginning and my end. Once the week was over, I’d walk away from her, find the bastards who’d set this in motion, and make them pay for what they were putting her through. My guilt wouldn’t let me walk away without knowing she would return to the life she deserved because there was no way in hell she was ready for the life she thought she wanted. A life with me.
Noemi trembled in my arms.
“I’m working on it, baby girl.” My voice lowered. I wanted her confidence. I needed her to believe in me. “You’re going to be just fine, but you’re going to have to trust me.”
There was no hesitation in her voice as she replied simply, “I do.”
