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I tried to step out of the way and blend into the beadboard so Lilly and Noemi could have a few moments of privacy. They whispered quietly with each other for several minutes before there was hugging and crying.
And finally, Lilly was ready to leave.
I held her during the drive home. She snuggled into my chest, and I marveled at how it felt like she’d always been a part of me. How did I ever sleep when she wasn’t next to me? How did I ever laugh... well, I rarely did before I met her.
Fuck. I still had a lot of shit to figure out, but I was more than willing to put in the work if holding Lilly Calegari in my arms every night was going to be my reward.
We made the short drive to my house outside of Bridgeport. I was greeted by the rest of my entourage, but I didn’t have the energy for a late nighter. I didn’t want to talk to them when my dick was already aching.
“You know where my room is.” I kissed Lilly in front of them all, making a statement I knew they’d understand. I didn’t need to spell it out for them. “Get comfortable. I have to settle a few things here first.”
“See you soon.” She smiled, spun around on her high heels, and held her head high like the queen she was as she walked down the hall to my suite.
I had left Fabian in New York to start the recovery process, but I had already given directions to the men I had left behind in Connecticut. No one would be out of the loop on this one.
“Things have changed.” I met each of their gazes once we reached the sanctitude of my office. “Whatever we’ve been working on until now stops. I want everyone’s attention turned to one thing, oneman. I want to know what the hell Christian Delacroix’s problem is, why he wants Dante Calegari dead, and why the fuck he dragged me into it.”
***
ISTOOD OUTSIDE MYbedroom door and took a deep breath, like an anxious groom on his wedding night. Why does making love to a woman become more intense after you’ve told her you love her? I wasn’t worried about disappointing her, but the game had irrevocably changed. I knew when I said those three words to her she was the last woman I’d ever make love to. There was no possibility anyone could surpass her.
I pushed the door open. When I walked in, Lilly was standing by the window wall, bringing a flashback to this morning’s events. My instincts screamed for me to run across the room and pull her out of harm’s way, but my eyes feasted on the silhouette of her body as the moonlight glinted off her curves. We had traveled all day, whether by car or private plane. We were all tired. I kept my conversation with the guys brief and to the point. During that time, Lilly had been busy.
The blankets from the bed were arranged in front of the lit fireplace, much like they were the last night we had spent in this room.
“I would have ordered fondue,” she said, “but I thought it was too late to wake anyone.”
“You can have anything you want, anytime you want it.”
She shrugged, giving me a small smile as I closed and locked the door. “I’m not that spoiled.”
“Not yet.” I crossed the room to stand in front of her. “But this is going to be your home, if you want it to be. For as long as you want it to be. What’s mine is yours.”
I didn’t understand her giggle until I followed her line of sight to the bedside table.
“I’m glad you feel that way. I couldn’t leave it behind. It’s really not such a bad little owl.”
I kissed her on the forehead with a small warning. “You can have the damn thing if you want it, but throw it at me again, and you won’t sit for a week.”
“Well, as thrilling as that idea is, I think I’ll pass. Besides, I have another idea in mind.”
“I’m intrigued, Miss Calegari. What wicked thoughts have occupied your mind?”
Lilly walked to the nightstand with a deliberate slowness that made my blood burn. She opened the drawer and turned around, biting her lower lip and dangling the diamond and crystal encrusted handcuffs from her index finger.
She held them up. “You asked me once if I trusted you.”
My heart rate sped up with heady anticipation. “And?”
“And I don’t.”
There had to be more, because that was a lie. She was still here with me. After all the shit - the lies, the cryptic crap, as she called it. After the threats and the secrets revealed. After the tears and the anger. After our bodies clung together in pure sexual need, in frustration, in carnal rage. After all that, she couldn’t deny what we had.
“I don’t just trust you,” she said as she walked back to me. Lilly stopped in front of me and held the handcuffs up. “I love you.”
She whispered the words, but I knew she meant them. Her eyes never left mine.
“I thought I should try to explain it, but I can’t. I don’t know how it happened or what it is about you, but I knew... I knew that first night at The Beast. I could literallyfeelyou standing next to me,knewthat you were different from the rest. You give me a sense of myself that no one else does. You make me whole, and I didn’t even know a part of me was missing. I think I’d been without that piece of me for so long... You were right.” Her voice broke. “I was masked and hidden. Trying to be what people expected because that was safe... only, I never felt safe. And it’s absolutely ridiculous to think, after helicopters and so much broken glass today, but despite all that, you make me feel safe. When the gunfire started, all I could think about was you. If something had happened to you...”
I took the handcuffs from her and slipped them into my pocket.
“Don’t say another word. Nothing is going to happen to me.”
Immediately, she shook her head. “You can’t promise me that. Ever. Please don’t try.” She gripped my neck and pulled my head down to hers. “I know you and I know the man you are and the men you deal with. I can’t ask you to change your life, but in this, you are not different from the rest. You’re human, Sebastian. I love you, but you’re real. I’ve already lost so much. Losing you...”
I didn’t know how to stop her, so I covered my mouth with hers, taking every bit of what she had to offer. I slipped my hand into my pocket and pulled out the cuffs. “You can cuff me to you for the rest of your life if you want, Princess. I’m not going anywhere.”
