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“You don’t think I fucking know he would be ashamed of me, asshole?” I scream at the top of my lungs. “You don’t think every time I’ve made a mistake or when I’ve been nothing but weak or a failure that I don’t think about how disappointed in me he would be? You don’t think I know if he could see me now, he’d be fucking ashamed to call me his daughter, his heir? You don’t think I know I’m an embarrassment to his name?” I ask in a broken whisper as tears stream down my face.
“Always with the fucking tears,” he says in a cold voice, detached of any emotion.
“Shut the fuck up, Mase!” Grayson growls.
“Or what, Gray? You’re going to fight over this piece of trash?” he asks incredulously.
“Has this weekend not done anything for you? Because you’re still being an asshole!” Gray yells at his brother.
“I fucking wish you would have succeeded and killed yourself when you slit your wrists this past weekend!” he spits with so much hate directed toward me. Once again, the cycle of his viciousness begins.
My face falls and I’m sure the agony and destruction of what he just said shows on my face because a second later his eyes go wide. Before he can say anything else, Grayson is landing a right hook to his jaw. He lets out a grunt, stumbling back from the force of Gray’s hit.
“You just dug yourself a deeper grave, asshole!” Grayson yells at his brother.
Mason throws a punch and the two of them throw blows at each other. Somehow, they manage to get outside Gray’s room and are in the corridor. They land punch after punch on each other with no intention of stopping.
They keep moving. Without thinking, I run out of the room and try to stop them but it’s no use. They go tumbling down the stairs. When they land at the foot of the stairs, they’re on top of each other, trying to get the best of one another, but they’re both powerful in their own right and neither of them is giving up.
I run down the stairs and reach them just as they’re up and off the floor still fighting. I try to pull Grayson away from Mason. It’s at the wrong time because Mason ends up landing a punch to the side of my rib and I instantly cry out from the pain. It feels like all the air has left my body in a whoosh.
A second later, my mother and their dad come rushing into the foyer to see what all the ruckus is about.
“What the hell is going on with you two?” Alister demands but none of them are paying attention to him. They both have their gazes locked on each other, not moving an inch.
“You’re seriously letting this whore come between us?” Mason questions in a very pissed-off tone.
“Watch your fucking mouth!” Grayson snaps, lunging for his brother again, but Alister grabs onto him and holds him back.
“What the hell is wrong with you two?” Alister demands again.
“Ask him! Ask him why the hell he was in bed with this whore!” Mason yells.
All their eyes turn toward me crumpled on the floor, my hand clutching my side. Man, that was a fucking hit. My ribs hurt more than anything right now.
“Dear God, look at you! You’re just an embarrassment all around!” my mother says as she looks down at me with nothing but disdain and disgust. “Is this how you parade yourself in this house, in nothing but your undergarments? Don’t you have any respect for the other people in this house?” she snaps at me. Damn, she didn’t even ask if I was okay and that shit still stings no matter how many times I try to convince myself that her opinion or love doesn’t matter to me anymore. I guess we’re all liars in this house.
I look down and realize I’m still in only my bra and panties. Shit! I didn’t have time to put on any clothes since I was too busy trying to keep those two from killing each other.
“I-I-I’m sorry,” I whisper while trying to sit up. I need to get upstairs and away from everyone. I can barely move because the pain is unbearable.
Grayson rushes over to me and helps me up. I let out a cry as pain slices through me.
“Come on, let me take you back upstairs so I can take a look at it,” he whispers to me. I nod and then keep my head down so I can hide behind the curtain of my hair while we make our way upstairs again. I can’t look at anyone right now because I’m utterly humiliated. Everyone hates me and trying to cope with that is just getting exhausting as the days go by.
We get up the stairs and into the bathroom. Grayson sets me on the toilet seat while he takes a look at the bruise forming on my rib. After, he changes the bandages on my stomach. None of the stitches have burst, thankfully.
“You’re probably going to be bruised for a while,” he says when he’s done.
“What else is new?” I mumble.
I fucking wish you would have succeeded and killed yourself are the only words that keep running through my head. They’re words that will forever be imprinted into my soul. The love of my life wishes me dead…
Grayson takes me back to my room and has me sit on my bed before he goes and rummages through my closet. He comes back with an oversized shirt, and I put it on. He then leaves and goes into the bathroom before coming back with a glass of water.
I take it and drink. I’m suddenly so tired. Taking my time, I move further onto my bed and lie down on the pillows. He pulls the blanket over my body and then he just stares at me for a second.
“Do you want me to stay with you?” he asks gently.
“No, I just want to be left alone,” I whisper.
Grayson leans down and presses a kiss to my forehead. “I’m sorry. I’m sure he didn’t mean those words,” he says.
“He did. But don’t worry, I’m used to them. He wishes I was dead, I say in a hollow voice.
Gray watches me for another long moment before he finally leaves. As soon as he does, the tears I’ve been trying to hold in come out in gut-wrenching sobs. Truth is, I am used to his harsh words, but it doesn’t make hearing them any easier. The more he says them, the deeper they cut. They’re buried so far down into my soul I don’t think I’ll ever be able to get them out.
The sobs keep coming until my head feels fuzzy and I pass out from the sheer exhaustion of everything that happened this morning.
