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I cut him off, “Soon to be ex-husband.”
He smiles. “Yes, soon to be ex…What if things had been different…would you have stayed?”
“Stayed?” I ask, almost stupid with lust.
“In bed. Would I have woken up to you beside me, after spending the night by your side? After having what is inarguably the best night of my life…the best sex of my life…”
I close my eyes and am hit with the memory of Cash above me, under me, behind me, inside me. When I open them, I give him a teasing reply, “In this dream are you not the CEO of a Fortune 100 company?”
His eyes don’t give in to the banter. “I’m me and you’re you…without the husband…”
I sigh. “Would I have stayed…and what? Become the next Mrs. James?”
He shakes his head, and his eyes finally leave my own—the spell broken. He backs away, leaving me cold against the glass.
Why did I say that? Why can’t I ever just say the right thing?
Unable to handle the loss of his heat, I turn around to look out the window, hoping to find what he’d been pointing at before. But I just see the city I’ve come to love. A place that I used to envision as my freedom that now acts as a cage around us both. We can’t be the two people he wants us to be because there’s eyes everywhere in the city watching his every move.
And yet like he said, I couldn’t stop myself if I tried. Facing away from him, with my fingertips against the window, I sigh. “Yes, I would have stayed. Yes, to everything.”
I spin around to face him, to see if we can figure out how to really make this work, but the room is empty.
My admission echoes inside my head. I really did want it. I really did want him. But as always, the timing was off.
Chapter 21
Grace
It’s a slow torture watching the man you are not so secretly falling for date other women. No matter what I want, Cash’s situation and my baggage make it impossible for us to be together. Not that he’s reached out again. It’s really for the best. He deserves someone who isn’t broken, not someone who can’t even figure out the way to properly express herself.
So, I’m back to watching Cash date other women. It’s a fun time. The second date for Cash goes off without a hitch. I keep my gaze off Cash and instead focus on his date’s reaction to their chemistry. It’s nonexistent. That might have made the entire night more palatable if I’m being honest.
The third date…the third date is a bit more difficult. She’s gorgeous and it seems that Cash is trying to prove a point because he’s all over her. And drunk. I leave before I have to witness a kiss, or God forbid see him go home with her.
Is this situation ideal? No, absolutely not. But I’m a professional; I can do this.
What I can’t do is act cool, calm, and collected about dinner with my mother. And unfortunately, she showed up thirty minutes before Cash’s next date.
His fourth date. At this point it should be easy to see him with other women. We are going into our third week of working together, and it’s been a month since Florida. It’s been almost two weeks since he pushed me against the window in his office and offered me everything. I’ve maintained control since then—I’ve acted like a professional. And yet the idea of having to control my emotions over Cash while also controlling my emotional reaction to my mother just might put me over the edge. A woman only has so much poise, so much patience, so much control.
“Why don’t I join you both?” Marion says from the door.
I shake my head to let her know that I haven’t told my mother about Steven and then smile and accept her kind offer. “We’d love that, right, Mom?”
My mother turns around and looks back at Marion in faux surprise. They may have been best friends for the last forty or so years, but when it comes to Marion’s and my relationship, my mother has a jealous streak a mile long. Not that she cared when I was a kid and she pawned me off on Marion almost every weekend so she could date whoever was in the revolving door of men. Now she acts affronted that Marion and I have a relationship outside of her.
“Of course, Mare. Will Steven be joining us too, Grace?”
Without batting an eye, the lie slips from my tongue. “Nope, he has to work late, and I was supposed to be attending a work thing. He doesn’t like watching other people date.”
My mother gives a frustrated sigh. “Well, why would he? So where are we off to tonight? Who’s the lucky bachelor?”
Marion interjects, “Cassius James. You know, James Spirits.”
My mother’s shoulders stiffen slightly, and she shoots Marion a look I can’t quite decipher. Interesting. I file my observation away to ask Marion about it later and stand up from my desk. We are going to be late if we don’t leave.
“So you just watch them all night?” my mother asks as I glance in Cash’s direction. He looks tired. Maybe he had a repeat with one of the other women last night. Or someone I don’t know about. He definitely does not look like he got a good night’s sleep.
