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“But now?” Regina asked, signaling that Sylvie had taken a much longer pause than she realized.
“Now . . . I think what’s done is done.” She shrugged. “What good is being upset going to do? He’s not here to answer our questions. I loved that man more than anything. He was my role model. My idol. I don’t want to tarnish that by assuming the worst. Maybe he didn’t know what to do with the information I found and he made the wrong choice out of fear. I mean . . . I don’t know what I would’ve done.”
Regina shook her head. “I know what you would’ve done. The same thing you did yesterday. Tell the truth.” She rested her face in her hand. “Who knows how different things would be if they’d put a stop to the lies decades ago.”
“Maybe he was worried about legal repercussions or about bringing shame to the family,” Sylvie guessed.
Regina leaned back and looked at her thoughtfully. “This is not how I expected you to react. So calm and taking it all in stride.” A slow, knowing smile crept onto her lips. “You’re in love with her, aren’t you?”
Sylvie’s eyes widened. She opened her mouth to deny it but nothing came out.
Regina’s cheeks brightened like two waxy Red Delicious apples had ripened on her face.
“I knew it!” She laughed, a joyful sound growing out of the depths of her soul. “I knew you and that nice girl always had something going on.”
“We didn’t,” she denied the allegation out of reflex. “I mean.” She took a breath. “I don’t think we did.”
She waved her hand in the air as if the topic was an odor to clear. “Who cares how you got here. I like her. I think she’s good for you and you’re probably good for her. Keep her on her toes.” She laughed again. “Everybody needs balance.”
Sylvie smiled, unable to contradict her even if habit compelled her to try. “I don’t know Madrina. When I’m with her its like. . .” She pressed down on her stomach as the sensation of flying around on a roller coaster took hold. “The feeling is. . .” She slid her hand up to her chest where her heart stretched to fill the cavity. “I can’t explain it.”
Regina stretched across the desk and took Sylvie’s hand, her eyes brimming with unshed tears. “That’s love, mija. It’s confusing and big and overwhelming in the very best way.”
“But it’s too soon,” Sylvie countered, expecting her godmother to lean back in her chair and nod. To agree that it was unreasonable to feel that yet.
“Says who?”
“I don’t know.” Her attention bounced around the room as if the right words were hiding somewhere just out of reach. “We’ve literally only just. . .” she flushed with heat, unprepared to talk about sex with a family member. “We just started exploring what we mean to each other. It’s too soon to—”
“Honey, if you know it,” she let go of Sylvie’s hand and pointed at her chest, “you know it. There is no set time for these things. And if the word freaks you out, then you know what?” She threw her hands in the air. “Don’t call it anything, but do feel it, mija. Do enjoy it because feeling that is sacred. Treasure it. Don’t get in your head about it. Just feel it.”
Sylvie bit the inside of her cheek. “That’s the weird part, Madrina. It’s like when I’m with her I get so caught up. I can’t really get in my head. It’s like she consumes me. All of me.” She shrugged, completely at a loss. “It’s like I can’t help but feel it.”
Regina stood and pulled Sylvie into a crushing embrace. “That, mi vida, is how you know you’ve found the other half of your orange.” She laughed, emotion making her voice vibrate and making Sylvie’s own eyes well up against her will. “You guard that feeling fiercely. And if your parents aren’t totally on board yet, don’t worry. They love you and want what’s best for you. When they see how Lauren makes you feel, they’ll love her too.”
With a sigh, Sylvie gave her godmother another squeeze before releasing her. “You really think that could happen? The Campos and the Machados breaking bread?”
Regina winced. “They might break a few plates before they get to the bread,” she admitted, tilted her head to the side. “But I know they’ll accept it. They’re going to have to.”
Sylvie took a deep breath. “I hope you’re right. Thanks for the pep talk. I’m going to place a few orders and then run out.”
“Oh?” Regina quirked her brow. “And where are you going?”
“I might be seeing Lauren this afternoon,” she replied innocently.
“Good! I’ve told you a thousand times you don’t have to work nearly as hard as you do. Maybe you’ll finally start to see that.”
“Let’s not get crazy,” she replied with a smirk before turning to her work. If she hurried, she could zip through her task in half an hour. Not a moment too soon.
A knockon the butcher-paper-covered front door stopped Lauren and her father’s conversation where they stood in front of a glass pastry case.
He checked his watch while starting for the door. “Good thing we were here. Fernando has never been early once.
“That’s Sylvie,” Lauren corrected his assumption.
Her father paused his advance and turned to her. With raised eyebrows he gave her a really? with his eyes.
Lauren replied with a sheepish grin. “You have to get used to her, Dad. And isn’t it better this way than with the whole family, all at once?”
