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"Well, I was going to go this way. But you decided it wasn't the right way," I snap at him. The sudden realisation I have no purpose taking away all of my good feelings. I'm sure other people feel the same when they realise it too.
"I didn't say it wasn't. I just asked if it was."
"Potato, potatoe," I reply, trying to be flippant and failing miserably.
"Can we just go?"
"Sure." I turn away from him, trying to ignore the look he still has in his eyes. The man wants me. I'm pretty sure anyway. But I don't think he'll do anymore to have me. Which is good as far as I'm concerned. I'm not convinced I'd be able to resist him if he tries anything.
Chapter 4
I feel sweaty and disgusting after just half an hour of walking, I'm feeling unreasonably sweaty. I'm sure it must be illegal for vampires to sweat. What with the super strength and super speed, I'd think they'd develop a way not to end up drenched to the bone and smelling to high heaven.
Well, not heaven. That's pretty much off the cards now, and I know it. Though given how many people I've murdered, I'm pretty sure it was off the table anyway. Go me.
I huff as we walk speedily. I think we're both aware that was need to find somewhere to rest again before day break comes. We still have time. Luckily the short nights haven't rolled in yet. But I'm also constantly looking. I don't want to be caught out. Not again.
At least there's no one following us.
"How far are we from home?" I ask, after about ten more minutes if silence. That kiss broke us. Well, not broke, but it's changed things. And it's pretty much all I can think about, even if I want to deny that.
"Home?" Bram jumps on the word instantly. "A den of nasty vampires is your home?" He almost sneers, but I catch the hope in his voice.
"Erm..."
"Did I just catch out the big bad vampire hunter?" he teases, flipping back to the somewhat good natured. This is going to give me whiplash if he carries on.
"I'm not a hunter anymore," I mutter, pretty much admitting it out loud for the first time. I'm not sure what to make of that.
"Oh so you're admitting that now?"
"Yes."
"Took you long enough."
"It's been like a week," I bit back.
"That's quite a lot of blood to consume while being in denial."
"I wasn't in denial," I lie. Half-lie, if I'm being fair to myself. I've known really. I was, and still am, hesitant to voice the thought out loud. If I do that, then I have to admit that the things I've done so far in my life have been wrong. And I saw how well that goes down with me back in the bunker with all the blubbering.
Technically, I can try and say that some of it isn't my fault. But I don't think anyone will believe that. I don't believe that really. I chose to put a stake through each of those vampires' hearts. Or to burn them with holy water. I could have said no. I should have said no. I may have ended up dead for doing it, but at least I wouldn't have lost a part of my soul while doing those things. Maybe now I can start doing things to atone for those mistakes.
I snort. How on earth did I go from hating vampires, to believing I can redeem myself as one of them. And so quickly? Maybe I never believed they were all bad. I push the thought away. If I've never believed vampires are bad, then that makes what I did to them, ten times worse.
"I know what denial looks like," Bram points out.
I spin around so I'm facing him, resting my hands on my hips and giving him a pointed look.
"Only because you're so far in it, you can spot everyone else hiding things from a mile off."
"I'm not in denial," he denies. Like a big denying denier.
Okay, that's a childish thought. And a little uncalled for. His wife did do the things he says she did. And I'm guessing she died the way he says too. Which means denial is probably the only way for him to cope.
"Aren't you?" I demand, instead of letting it go like I know I should. "Because what your wife did to you isn't worth brooding over. Or hating the world over. She was unfaithful while you didn't want her to be. She strayed from you, abandoned you and probably got herself killed." My voice cracks at the end, surprising me massively. Why do I care so much? What has gotten into me?
"I-" He looks away, something like realisation flitting across his face.
