Page 89 of BTW I Love You


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‘What about you?’

‘Hmm?’ he said, distracted as he checked his blind spot.

‘What about you? Wasn’t it hard for you too?’ Had she finally found a chink in his armour?

‘Me?’ He gave a hollow laugh as if the suggestion was ridiculous. ‘Not particularly.’ He sent her an easy smile. ‘Maddy’s a romantic. She wanted their marriage to work. I didn’t care.’

Ruby frowned. What a strange thing to say. Surely you didn’t have to be a romantic to want your parents’ marriage to work?

She wouldn’t call herself a romantic because she’d seen how the romantic ideal had failed to save her own family. But that hadn’t made her lose sight of all the good things marriage had to offer.

From the conversation they’d shared that morning on the Heath, it was clear Cal prided himself on being pragmatic and logical. But had a difficult childhood turned that pragmatism and logic to cynicism?

‘When people fall in love, marriage is the logical next step,’ she remarked. ‘That’s not always a bad thing, surely?’

Cal groaned inwardly as he eased his foot off the accelerator and cruised into the inside lane. The L word. How did women always find a way to insinuate it into any conversation about relationships? And why had he thought Ruby would be different? ‘I’ve got to tell you,’ he said. ‘I didn’t have you pegged as the hopeless romantic type.’

‘I’m not.’ She snorted out an incredulous laugh. ‘Marriage is complicated. Believe me I know that. My parents had what everyone thought was a good marriage on the surface. Solid, sweet, loving, supportive. But when it ended, it turned out there was a lot going on beneath the surface.’

‘So they got divorced. That’s a good thing,’ Cal remarked forcefully.

Normally, he avoided personal conversations with women he was sleeping with—but the sudden sadness in her voice had tugged at his usual reserve.

‘You were better off,’ he added. ‘I wish to hell my parents had had the guts to get a divorce.’

‘My parents didn’t get divorced,’ she said. ‘Their marriage ended when my mother died.’

Cal’s fingers tightened on the wheel at Ruby’s toneless words, completely devoid of self-pity. Now would probably be a good time to change the subject. But instead of the impersonal apology that was supposed to come out of his mouth, he heard himself saying: ‘How old were you when she died?’

‘Ten.’

Damn. His chest tightened at the curt reply.

‘That must have been really tough,’ he murmured, surprised by the surge of sympathy. His own mother had never had much time for him or Maddy. She’d always been far too busy navigating the wreck of her marriage. But losing her would have left a hole. If only a small one. Thinking of Ruby suffering such a loss at such a young age made him want to offer comfort. Not something he had a lot of experience with.

She gave her head a slight shake. ‘It was, but she’d been sick for over a year. What was much tougher was discovering right after she’d died that she wasn’t the perfect person I’d always thought she was. Far from it, actually.’

He concentrated on the road ahead, debating whether to ask the obvious next question. It wasn’t his business, but the bitter disillusionment in her tone was something he understood only too well.

‘What did you discover?’ he asked.

Seemed his fascination with Ruby hadn’t dimmed in the least, and his usual caution had deserted him.

CHAPTER TEN

RUBY frowned, not sure how she’d ended up talking about her mother to Cal of all people. It wasn’t as if what her mother had done was a big secret or anything. But she didn’t normally discuss this stuff, particularly with men she was dating. It was a total downer.

‘Cal, it’s okay, you don’t have to listen to my life story,’ she said, trying to deflect him.

‘I know that.’

‘You can’t be remotely interested.’

‘I wouldn’t have asked if I wasn’t,’ he said, not sounding deterred in the least. ‘Come on. Whatever she did, it can’t have been all that terrible.’

‘You think?’ Animosity scoured her throat. ‘How about she screwed another man just after she married my dad. Got pregnant. And then passed the baby off as his?’

The words spewed out, harsh and judgmental.

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