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The next month had flown past as she’d pushed her broken heart to the back of her mind and concentrated all her efforts on remaking herself into the real Eva Redmond. She’d chucked out her wardrobe full of biege. She’d got a business loan, moved out of her dull suburban semi, moved into a chic little studio flat in Stoke Newington, and launched her own web-based heir-hunting and ancestral research business. Her client list was still small, but, with her overheads minimal and the two big contracts she’d secured from her contacts at Roots Registry, she had made an excellent start.
The only big blot on her horizon had been her complete inability to start dating. Which she had a terrible feeling derived from some subconscious belief that she’d never be able to find anyone to replace Nick.
She clutched the phone tighter, forcing back the urge to slam it down.
‘How is he?’ she heard herself ask Tess.
She could do this. She could have a conversation about him without bursting into tears. She had to. If she was ever going to be free of him for good.
‘Really angry actually,’ came Tess’s reply.
‘Angry with whom?’ Eva said, curiosity going some way to dim the pain.
‘With you.’
Eva’s eyes popped wide. ‘Why would he be angry with me?’
‘It has to do with Bill, the computer programmer.’
‘Bill? Bill who? I don’t know anyone called Bill,’ Eva said, not just curious now but completely confused.
‘Bill’s… Well, Bill’s a long story.’ Tess’s voice rose, getting more dramatic by the second. ‘And he’s sort of beside the point,’ she added evasively. ‘The thing is, I saw Nick. And he was looking all sexy and intense and gorgeous. And then he came up to me. I think to ask about you. And I got so angry with him I totally lost it and stupidly told him how devastated you were when he dumped you.’
‘Oh, Tess, you didn’t.’ The thought of Nick knowing about the extent of her meltdown had humiliation stabbing under her breastbone right alongside the pain. In those dark days after his departure, the one thing she’d had was her pride. She could always feel relieved that she’d never blurted out the truth to him and told him how hard she’d fallen for him.
And now she didn’t have that any more.
‘But listen,’ her friend began. ‘There is a good side to this. Because, Eva, from his reaction, I’m totally convinced he’s not over you. Honestly, he went pale. And then he got all fired up when I told him about Bill. He stormed out of the gallery.’ Tess huffed out a deep breath, the frantic tumble of information stuttering to a halt. ‘I think he might be coming to London. To see you.’
Eva squeezed her eyes shut, let the wave of misery wash through her.
Nick wasn’t coming to see her. Why would he? If he’d wanted to be with her, he never would have left her the way he had. Or at the very least he would have contacted her long before now. Tess with her overactive imagination and gung-ho personality had simply misinterpreted his reaction and read into it the most ridiculous scenario possible.
‘Look, Tess. Thanks for letting me know.’ She drew in a steadying breath. ‘But don’t worry, I’m sure nothing will come of it.’
She ended the call as quickly as possible and settled the phone back in its cradle. Then took a deep breath.
Stop that right now.
She wasn’t going to let herself get sucked under again. She was a stronger person now. A more confident, more independent, much less fragile person. Who was not going to get all choked up about a guy who had always been wrong for her.
Pushing away from the desk, she made her way to the hall closet and pulled on her raincoat. That said, she might as well admit that after Tess’s call she was unlikely to get any more work done today. She’d go for a walk to Clissold Park. The new café there was always buzzing with people and the chilly autumn air would do her good and stop her moping around the flat, thinking about things—and people—it would be better for her not to think about.
The brisk wind ruffled her hair as she stepped out onto the pavement and locked the door behind her. She noticed the taxi stopped at the kerb in front of the house, just as a tall, painfully familiar figure got out.
‘Eva?’
Shock came first, before the tumult of emotions she’d thought she’d conquered surged back up her torso.
‘What are you doing here?’ Her voice echoed from a million miles away.
‘I want you back.’
She stared at him. That sharply handsome face that had haunted her dreams. And knew she couldn’t do this. She wasn’t ready.
She had a good life. It wasn’t safe and secure any more. Thank goodness. Now she had challenges. Now she was her own person. Now she was the real Eva Redmond who had guts and courage galore. But he could take all that away from her… If she let him.
‘Don’t…’ She shook her head fiercely. ‘I can’t.’
