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I liked how stubborn she was, rising to every challenge that was set to her.
No, I loved it.
The real challenge is going to be letting her go afterwards.
Sadly, it was. Because no matter how much I liked spending time with her, the days of our affair were numbered. I had other things to do and so did she, and there was no room in my life for more than what we had right now. There never had been. I wasn’t a man built for relationships. Not given how severely I’d mismanaged the few relationships I did have.
She’d told me it wasn’t too late, but she didn’t understand. Of course it was too late. The money I’d lost for Mum was gone and with it her trust in me. And as for Seb...twelve years of me being a bastard would be too much for anyone, let alone him.
It had been tempting to throw the gift of the islands back in his face, but Delaney had been so thrilled at selling them to me that I hadn’t been able to refuse.
Careful. You’re getting soft.
The rays of the setting sun slid over Ellie’s tanned and golden skin, bringing out the gold lights in her brown hair. It was damp and had dried with a slight wave to it, and lying there naked, toying with her glass, a smile playing around her lovely mouth, she looked like a goddess.
No, fuck, I wasn’t soft. I was hard. Especially looking at her.
Oh, really? And the surprise you organised for her in London isn’t soft?
No, it wasn’t. It was a parting gift, nothing more.
Tomorrow we would leave and I was absolutely fucking fine with that.
A strange feeling of pressure pushed against my heart, an ache that I couldn’t seem to get rid of.
I ignored it.
‘Speaking of the programme,’ I said, a part of me reluctant to broach the topic, but knowing I needed to. ‘We’re leaving tomorrow, remember?’
Instantly the light that had been in her eyes died and she looked away, fussing with her drink. ‘Oh, yes, of course.’
The pressure in my chest became painful. ‘We need to leave it here, Ellie.’
Her gaze came to mine then flicked away again. ‘What happens in Dubai stays in Dubai, you mean?’
‘Yes.’ The word sounded heavy and there was a part of me that hated the finality in it. ‘It was only ever meant to be a few days and it’s been a week already.’
She looked down at her drink again, her lashes lowered, the light catching in the small golden strands. ‘Sure.’ Her lashes lifted again and she looked at me. ‘No drama.’ Her mouth curved in a smile that for some reason made the twisting sensation in my chest twist tighter. It wasn’t forced. It was completely natural and somehow that made it worse. ‘It’s been great, Ash. I mean...really great.’
This was her brave face, wasn’t it? I knew. I could see the currents of pain in her green eyes. The currents she couldn’t quite hide. She was so laid-back and easy-going on the surface, but underneath there were passions in her that were vast and powerful.
Passions like mine.
I met her gaze, bearing her pain, ignoring the way it echoed inside me. ‘Better than great. Even sensational wouldn’t cover it.’ I let her see how much I meant it then went on, ‘But all good things must come to an end.’
She gave a small laugh that sounded less like amusement than any laugh I’d ever heard. ‘I guess they must.’ After a second she lifted her glass and drained it, putting it down on the little table next to her. ‘One question I’ve been meaning to ask you. Why do you talk the way you do? You don’t sound like a guy brought up on a council estate.’
My pretty little thing. She was always curious about me, wasn’t she? ‘It made school easier. And then I found out that it puts people off balance. I’m scarred and rough and yet I talk like an aristocrat. People find it very confronting.’
Her gaze was direct. ‘It must get boring confronting people all the time. Don’t you ever get tired of it?’
I felt something shift inside me. Something I didn’t particularly want to pay attention to. ‘What do you mean?’
‘Your whole life, Ash. It’s basically one big fight, isn’t it? Against your brother. Against your mother. Against your father. Against the entire world, really. Don’t you ever want to stop proving yourself to everyone all the time?’
I didn’t know why all the muscles in my body tightened, as if I’d just taken a b
low. ‘I’m not proving myself to anyone,’ I snapped, scowling. ‘I’m being who I am. And if people can’t accept that then that’s their problem.’
