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She frowned, knowing this to be the case and still somehow finding it impossible to process. An ache began to throb, deep in her chest. Or was it more like a ticking—incessant, unstoppable, louder and louder, speeding up and echoing the frantic racing of her heart?
‘What’s going to happen when our baby is born?’ she whispered, curling her hands over her stomach. ‘And I want to take him or her to Italy to see his grandfather? Or his uncle? Are you going to resent that? Are you going to hate me being there? Are you going to refuse to come? Or will you come and fight with two of the people I care about most?’
He ground his teeth together. ‘I’ve told you, your relationship with them has nothing to do with me.’
She shook her head painfully. ‘But what of our child’s relationship with them? I will be raising our baby to love their whole family—that means my family—to talk about them with love, to speak Italian and understand his or her heritage. My child will have your last name but it will still be my child, of my family, with all that implies.’
His expression was shuttered. ‘But around me he will be Herrera,’ Antonio said simply. ‘As you are now.’
The ache in her chest grew. ‘I’m not any part of this feud,’ she said. ‘And I can’t believe you’re continuing after all this!’
‘I am doing no such thing,’ he said, his expression sombre. ‘I have made no move against your brother since we married. I have left his business interests alone, even though I have had opportunity to destroy him ten times over. What is this if not proof that I am standing by our agreement?’
‘Our agreement?’ She paled. ‘That’s why you’ve backed off from Carlo’s companies?’
He spun her around in his arms, his eyes searching hers. ‘Why else?’ The question was asked as if from the depths of his soul, as though he truly couldn’t comprehend what was wrong with that statement. ‘I am doing what you asked of me.’
And suddenly she needed to sit down. She collapsed onto the edge of the bed, pressing her fingertips into her temples.
‘Hermosa, what is it?’
&nb
sp; She ignored his apparent concern. ‘That damned deal we made way back then is why you’ve left Carlo alone? You’ve let him be only because I’m giving you Prim’Aqua.’ Her eyes glistened when she lifted them to his. ‘That’s all you care about.’
He swore softly. ‘Not all I care about.’
‘Yeah?’ she demanded, scoffing.
‘You know I care about you. It is why I’m here, Amelia, in the middle of the afternoon. Because the thought of you reading that article and thinking I had just given this interview...’
‘But you don’t love me,’ she interrupted curtly, gnawing on her lower lip.
His eyes showed consternation when they locked to hers, impatience too. ‘Love is beside the point,’ he intoned flatly, and the words seemed to come from a long way away. ‘I respect you and value you. I desire you and I have chosen to make a life with you.’
‘But love would be a reason to leave my family alone. Love would be a reason for you to forget your hatred of them.’
‘Nothing will allow me to do that,’ he said gently, crouching down so his eyes were level with hers. ‘I have hated them for ever and, no matter what role you play in my life, I can’t simply forget how I feel.’
‘You strike me as a man who can do anything he wants. So what you’re saying is that you don’t want to forgive them.’
His jaw was square, and the room was heavy with angst and sorrow for a moment before he nodded curtly. ‘No,’ he said at length. ‘I do not want to forgive them. I want to hate them. I like hating them.’
‘Even when it hurts me.’
He shook his head curtly. ‘They are separate to us.’
‘No, they’re not.’
‘They have to be. For our child, we must separate your family...’
‘No, for our child, you must forget your need for revenge...’
‘No.’ A simple, final word that was like a nail in the coffin of all of her hopes.
‘So your hatred for them is greater than anything you feel for me,’ she said with a nod, as the truth of their relationship crystallised in her mind. ‘You still expect me to hand over my shares in Prim’Aqua when our child is born?’
A muscle jerked in the base of his jaw and he didn’t answer for a beat. Then, ‘It’s what we agreed.’
