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Her body quivered as pleasure burst over her like a dam overflowing. She reached up, digging her fingers into the worn sofa behind her head, squeezing her eyes shut as wave after wave of pleasure soaked through her. Waves, intense, fierce and finally, relenting.
As they ebbed, thought returned.
And so too did the awful realisation of what had just happened.
Panic was hot on realisation’s heels.
Sarah swore beneath her breath, a violent curse that resonated around the room.
Syed, damn him, stood, his expression impossible to interpret, his eyes locked to hers.
She couldn’t bear it. The indignity of scrambling for her yoga pants was almost too much, and as though he understood that, he reached for them and handed them to her.
She didn’t thank him.
“Turn around.” A croaky request, issued as a directive.
If he wanted to argue, he apparently thought better of it, turning from her slowly, his hands on his hips.
Sarah dressed quickly, but when she stood, her knees were weakened by what had just happened. “I want you to get out of my house.”
He nodded, but when he spun around to face her, there was a harsh determination in his face that she hadn’t seen before. It wasn’t hard to picture him as a powerful ruler. This was a different side to the man she’d known.
“I am talking about a life-changing amount of money.”
“I’m not for sale,” she ground out. “If you knew anything about me, you’d know I would never do what you’re suggesting.”
Something like sorrow flickered in his gaze. “Not even for your daughter?”
Sarah recoiled visibly. “What are you talking about?”
“You can barely cover your bills.” She chose not to hear the scathing derision in his voice. “Don’t you think she deserves more financial security? You need help.”
“I don’t want your help,” she snapped, but anguish tore through her. For he was right. Completely right. She had been drowning for years and the idea of a simple kindness giving her breathing space was a talisman she needed to grab with both hands.
“Yes, you do.” He closed the distance between them, thumbing her cheek gently. “And you want me. So why not, what is it you say? Have your cake. And eat it too.”
She stared up at him, her breath coming in fits and spurts. “Because I’d hate myself,” she whispered, finally, tears moistening her lashes. “And I’d hate you, as well.”
His eyes narrowed with an emotion she couldn’t comprehend. “I thought you already do.”
She swallowed and nodded. “Yes. I do. I do hate you, Syed.” Her heart squeezed tight at the acknowledgement. Words she had flung at him so many times in her dreams now groaned out of her, but they didn’t offer the satisfaction she’d expected. “How can you even suggest…”
“I need you,” he said thickly. “I need you.”
Sarah dropped her eyes, fluttering her lashes against her cheeks. “I don’t care.”
“I need to be with you…”
“Why?”
Silence sparked between them, the electrical current intensifying with every second that passed.
“Why?” She repeated urgently, in pain, hurting all over.
“Because you are as much a fever in my blood as you were then. I need to lay this to rest once and for all.”
Her sharp intake of breath rung with pain. “You want to sleep with me to help you forget me?” She surmised, taking no pleasure from the admittance that he still craved her.
