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Bang.
I don’t understand what I’m seeing because all I can see is blood…so much blood. Another gunshot rings out, but I can’t focus on anything other than the lifeless form in front of me, twisted in a sad, bloodied heap.
I open my mouth, but not a sound can be heard. What I see is too horrific for words. So I run over and drop to my knees, cradling the limp body in my arms. “No,” I whimper, blinking past my tears because there is no way I’m seeing what I am.
But the warm blood coating my hands cements this as truth. In my arms lies Stella Lane. And she is dying.
Cayden races over, kneeling beside me, ensuring she’ll be okay as he dials 911. But when I look into her eyes, eyes so similar to mine, I know she won’t.
I don’t even know where Will is, but the fact that we’re not facing the same fate as Stella has me guessing Cayden finally ended what should have been done ten years ago. “The police are on the way.”
But it doesn’t matter. By the time help arrives, she’ll be gone. “Pe-Peyton,” she wheezes, flinching as she tries to raise her hand.
“No, don’t talk. Save your energy,” I say, trying my hardest not to break down because it’s my turn to be strong for her.
If it wasn’t for her selfless act, I would be the one lying on the floor because, without thought, Stella jumped in front of me and took a bullet intended for me. I owe her my life.
“Help is coming, okay?” I try to make her comfortable, but it’s in vain. “You can stay awake.”
“I can’t feel my legs,” she says, staring up at me, her hollow breaths rattling loudly.
Peering down, I see the gaping hole in her stomach is the reason for that. But I simply brush back her hair. “It’ll be okay.”
Cayden squeezes my arm, and the simple touch denotes that I’m not alone. I never was.
Stella’s eyes follow the movement, and a ghost of a smile plays at her bloodied lips. “I’m so-sorry, Cayden. I thought I was protecting her.”
“Shh, it’s okay. There is no need for apologies.”
But even nearing death, Stella Lane is stubborn as shit. “Look after h-her,” she stutters, a tremor overtaking her. “I’m sorry, Peyton. I’m sorry for everything. I would have lo-loved to be a grandmother. Be happy, and don’t look back.”
The tears I’ve attempted to keep at bay break past the floodgates, and I sob violently. “It’s okay…Mom.”
“You…you just called me…Mom.” Stella blinks past her tears and smiles, which is how she will be remembered, which is how she takes her last breath.
Even though I know what I’m seeing, my brain can’t seem to process that she’s gone. “No. No!” I cry, rocking her, but her limp body is just that—a vessel. Her soul has gone.
Gasping, I attempt to break the surface, but I suddenly can’t swim. The harder I push, the farther I sink. Invisible manacles secure my ankles, dragging me down. Muddy water fills my lungs, and before long, it’s all I can taste. I stop fighting and surrender…surrender to death.
The walls begin to close in on me, and I can’t breathe. Cayden’s voice floats into the background, but this time, it can’t be my anchor. I’m already drifting out to sea.
Will’s hollow sobs reveal he’s still alive, and knowing he will have to live with killing the love of his life on his conscience forever gives me an iota of comfort. The room spins, and the blackness tackles me by taking hold of my feet, dragging me under.
I gasp for air, as this feeling is one I’ve become accustomed to for months, but this time, I don’t fight it. I surrender because, just like Will, I have to live with what I’ve done.
“Snow, no! Don’t you dare! Come back to me.” Cayden’s cries cement the fact that I’m floating farther and farther away.
Other voices are suddenly mingled with his, and I feel a sense of comfort knowing he’ll be all right. I should have stayed lost because finding myself has cost so much. So I accept my fate and embrace the darkness. I lived in the light, and all it’s done is destroy.
My head hits the floor, and I yield because there is always solace in the darkness. But soon, that blackness bursts into an assembly of color, and moving pictures flicker behind my eyes. I can’t remember these images because they were lived in another lifetime.
I see myself as a young girl. Toothless and innocent as I run around the vibrant greens in what appears to be a Snow White outfit. Flashes of moving pictures flicker so quickly that I can barely keep up, but at the forefront is one image I can never forget—Cayden Coachman.
I see him as a boy, us together as teens, and then finally, as adults. I feel his kisses. I can hear him tell me that he loves me. He’s forever been my protector because he has loved me since the first moment we met.
Reality and the past intermingle, and I don’t know what’s real or not. But when Cayden presses his lips to my unmoving ones and breathes his life into me, I remember…I remember everything.
Be happy and don’t look back…
That’s what my mom asked me to do, and I won’t let her down ever again.
“I love…you,” I manage to spit out before I get lost in the memories which sparked this journey to begin.
So it seems fitting I end it here.
