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He held my gaze intently, the intention coming through those dark eyes of his loud and clear.
You need to be here. In February.
My stomach dropped as I realized Cynthia wasn’t the only person growing impatient with the way things were. I smiled weakly and glanced away. “I bet it’ll be beautiful.”
Asher stiffened at my non-answer. “Yep.” He withdrew from me to sit on the edge of the bed and drew on a pair of sleep pants. “It will be.”
“February’s looking a little exciting for me, too,” I said lightly. “Apparently, I have an award show to attend.”
Asher glanced over his shoulder. “Yeah?”
“My snowboard ad was nominated for a Clio.”
The tension in his face evaporated. “Are you serious? Faith…that’s fucking great. I’m so happy for you.” He climbed back into bed and kissed me.
“It’s more exciting than I thought it would be. When Terry kept saying it was going to happen, I sort of didn’t believe him.”
“I had no doubt.” Asher’s smile tightened. “We need to celebrate. You’ve never been to a luau in all your visits. Might be the perfect occasion.”
“Sounds lovely, but…I’m going to need some hot firefighter arm candy for that award ceremony.” My smile wavered. “I was hoping you’d be there with me.”
There. Now we’ve both put it out there.
I supposed Asher’s reluctance to upheave his life was just as potent as mine, because he stiffened up all over again.
“I’ll see what my schedule looks like. I’ve got a lot of shit going on…”
“Oh,” I said, my stomach dropping. “Sure. We can play it by ear.”
He got up from the bed. “Going to take a shower.”
I flopped back on the pillows, my eyes stinging. “I’ll be right here.”
For the next few days anyway. And then what?
The following afternoon, we visited with Asher’s family at their bungalow. Kaleo was already taller than last I’d seen him while Momi looked more frail in her chair, older by years somehow instead of months. But they all seemed happy, laughing, and talking and teasing one another. The family that I never had and that Asher had always wanted.
He’s not going to leave them,I thought with a sinking heart.Why would he?
Everyone made a big fuss over my nomination. Nalani made her key-lime pie and Morgan barbecued ribs and cooked up some homemade Hurricane fries. We sat out on the lanai, the ocean below and greenery all around. I felt Asher’s eyes on me frequently, hard and tense. This wasn’t new—usually there was a silent question floating between us of when we were going to be alone so we could have sex again. But this time around, his glances were heavy with a different kind of impatience.
God, being an irresponsible party girl was so much easier.
After dinner, I sat with Momi on the lanai while Asher and Kal threw a football around and Morgan snapped photos. Nalani left to take some limes from her tree to a neighbor.
I felt the older woman’s eyes move between Asher and me.
“He’s a good man,” she said suddenly. “But he worries me.”
“Why? Is something wrong?”
“No, dear. He’s healthy in body, but in spirit…very troubled.”
“Oh. How?”
“Caught between what he thinks he must do—his duty—and the desires of his heart.”
I shifted in my chair, cleared my throat. “And what would those be?” I asked weakly.
