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“Anytime, baby,” he says, and without thinking, I push him.
I know, I said no hitting, but pushing doesn’t count.
Right?
“Always wanting to put your hands on me,” he teases with a grin.
Now I’m gonna punch him!
But instead, I suck in a deep breath, letting it out of my nose before glaring up at him.
“No, remember I tried that, and you threw that chance away.”
He shrugs. “Wasn’t the right time.”
“Oh really? Could have fooled me when you had your tongue down my throat and your hands all over me.”
Shaking his head, he tucks his hands in his pockets in almost a boy next door way but I know he’s the devil in disguise. “It wasn’t right.”
“Oh yeah, the good-guy bullshit.”
Finally, his cool breaks. Glaring at me, he yells, “You were drunk, I was drunk!”
“Doesn’t stop anyone else.”
“Because they are dicks.”
“And so are you.”
“Really? Because I think we both know I’m not, you’re just so fucking prideful, you won’t admit I did you a favor!”
He’s kinda scary when he yells, not that I’m feeling that kind of way because I’m not.
Just for the record, of course.
“Favor? You rejected me! Made me feel this small,” I say, holding my thumb and forefinger out. “You embarrassed me. Told me my mom didn’t want me. How is that doing me a fucking favor? Please. Enlighten me.”
Looking away, he pulls in a breath through his nose and slowly nods his head. Looking back at me, his eyes hold mine, and I can see all the remorse in the world in them. This whole day I’ve been waiting to see his eyes tell me something, and finally they are talking to me. He’s sorry, but I don’t care, I won’t forgive him.
I can’t.
Clearing his throat, he says softly, “I am truly sorry for that. It was wrong of me, and I should have never said that. But you weren’t giving up, and I had no choice.”
I refuse to allow what he said come back and bother me. Shaking my head, I give a soulless laugh as I say, “Oh, because I’m such a thirsty bitch and I’m gonna beg for dick, eh?”
He shakes his head. “I never thought that. You were mad, you were drunk. Was I wrong? Fuck yeah, I should have never done it the way I did, but I didn’t trust myself to tell you no. I wanted you, Baylor. Bad. But I couldn’t do it.”
Completely perplexed, I shake my head. “How does that make sense? If you wanted me, then why didn’t you fuck me?”
I don’t even realize he’s moving until his face is in line with mine, his nose almost touching mine as his eyes bore into me. My whole body goes still, my breathing stops as his eyes search mine. It’s very hard to think when someone like Jayden Sinclair is that close to you.
“Did it ever fucking occur to you that you are worth way more than a one-night stand? Did it ever cross your mind that that’s why I did what I did? Because I respect you, and I think too highly of you than to fuck you and then leave you? Did it, Baylor?”
When I don’t answer, he shakes his head. “You think so low of yourself, you think that you’re only worth the respect in this sport, but you are worth way more than
that, okay? So yeah, I’m sorry, and believe me, I regret the way it went down. But I’m glad we didn’t sleep together,” he says, and I don’t know how he gets closer, but he does and my breathing, yeah, it’s nonexistent. “Because when I do lay you down, my body smothering yours, I want you to be completely aware of what is going on and who is giving you the greatest pleasure of your life.”
I’m speechless. Utterly speechless.
