AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Squeezing my eyes shut, I shrug. I wasn’t going to, I wasn’t, but then I’m unloading on her. I let her know about what happened with my family today, and how my mom loves me no matter what, even when I don’t deserve it. I tell her how I’m thinking of distancing myself from my dad, and then I somehow get into the fact that I’m declining in hockey. And when I finish, I swear I sound like a crazy person.
But when I meet her gaze, she isn’t looking at me like I am. She has nothing but concern in her eyes. Genuine concern for me. Clearing my throat, I say, “And then last night is really fucking with me.”
Her brows come together then. “What about last night?”
“I’m worried you only asked me to ask you to be my girlfriend because I kinda almost raped you.”
I know I didn’t, but I want to test the word out. See if it makes her flinch, but it doesn’t. Instead, she’s shaking her head, a grin pulling at her lips. “Jace. Be real. But before we get to that, let’s address everything else,” she says simply, her eyes on me as she laces her fingers with mine. “You aren’t declining, you’re just tired, baby. You are working yourself ragged. Between working, practice, school, and me, you have no time for you. To reboot. You need that.”
She’s right, but when? I have no time.
Before I can tell her that, she goes on, “Your family loves you no matter what and supports you. You said sorry, you owned up to your mistakes. There is nothing else you can do. Just accept it and let it go, or you are gonna drive yourself mad.”
Taking a step toward me, she wraps her arms around my waist, holding my hands with hers as her head falls back to look up at me. “And about last night, you in no way ‘kinda raped me.’ I asked you to ask me last night because I realized that I wanted to be your girlfriend. That we were never in the Javery zone. We were already in a relationship; I was just too scared to label it. And while I still am scared, I don’t want to be anything but your girlfriend.”
She says it from her heart. I can see that, hear it. For some reason, that calms me. Knocks a load off my chest. Hell, everything she said helps. I don’t know how to explain it, but she calms me. But still, the marks are there, taunting me. As I look into her eyes, I want to say something, I do. But her face is so bright. She looks so happy, and I don’t want to ruin that. I can’t ruin it.
“Blame it on the alcohol if you want, but I think it was when you held me after my almost panic attack,” she adds, her eyes searching mine. “Believe me, I want to be your girlfriend.”
Biting into my lip, I look away. “Are you gonna tell me why you almost had a panic attack?”
She shrugs. “One day.”
“Today?”
She shakes her head. “This isn’t about me. It’s about you, Jace. You need sleep, baby.”
Damn it. This is not going to be easy. “You’re right.”
“I am,” she says with a wink. “Now, why don’t you go home and go to sleep?”
“I have another shift at the shop. I doubled up so I don’t have to work on game day.”
“Okay. Well, go home afterward and sleep till tomorrow.”
“You don’t want to meet up?” I ask, moving my fingers through her long hair. “Thought maybe we could hang tonight?”
And maybe I can grow the balls to ask her about the marks.
“Not tonight. I have a date with Angie.”
“Angie?” I ask, confused. “My Angie?”
She grins. “Yup, Lucy Facebooked and asked me if I wanted to come up to the shop and make posters for tomorrow’s game with Angie. She’s been asking for me, you know, because I’m her new favorite.”
I scoff. “Please, I got years in on that kid. She is loyal to me. But cool, I’ll come.”
But she shakes her head. “No, you go sleep. Jace, you need it. You’re thinking you’re declining. That’s crazy talk from you, especially when you are amazing at everything you do.”
My lips curve and I know she’s right, but still, I want to see her tonight. “Counter offer?”
Her brow quirks up, a grin pulling at her lips. “I’m listening.”
“It’s only a two-hour shift. I’m covering for Chase while he does a supply run, no big deal. I’ll be home by two, and then I’ll sleep until you come back from my sister’s.”
She eyes me and then leans into me, going up on her tippy toes to kiss my chin. “Deal.”
Wrapping my arms around her waist, I kiss her nose. “Good.”
