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Chapter Twenty-Nine
Sofia
I don’t haveto pull Ryan far before we’re where I want to take him. I know he’s bummed, and I hate that. While I may not know much about hockey, I know losing six to one doesn’t do much for the ego. Because of this, I want to cheer Ryan up. I don’t want him to have such a defeated look on his face. It’s killing me.
I punch in the code for the gym while my other hand holds his. His thumb runs along the back of my hand, sending shockwaves up my arm. “Why are we going to the gym?”
“Shh,” I demand before pushing open the unlocked door and pulling him in. I hit the switch, and when the gym fills with fluorescent lighting, I know I’m home. My happy place. I grin back to him, and he perks a brow at me. “Come on.”
He groans as I pull him along. “I’d rather take you back to my dorm.”
I chuckle, and while I may want that too, we’d get distracted. Which wouldn’t be that bad, since I’m all for throwing my card in the trash, but I think he needs this. Coming to the foam pit, I toe out of my sneakers and jump into the pit of foam blocks, landing on my face. I roll over onto my back, laughing as I look up at him. He doesn’t seem the least bit impressed. “This is my favorite spot, ever.”
“A pit of foam blocks?”
I nod. “Yeah, it’s my safe zone. Come on.”
He hesitates. “Sofia—”
“Please,” I ask softly and very sweetly.
When I jut out my lip at him, he gives me a dry look. “Not fair.”
As he takes off his shoes, I call to him, “Well, grumpy ass, I have to play hardball.”
He chuckles softly before holding his arms out, looking like Jesus on the cross before falling face first into the foam pit. My laughter fills the gym as he rolls to his back, crossing his legs and arms before glancing over at me. “It’s really soft in here.”
“Yup, and it never fails me. I am never scared when I jump in here.”
“Cool.”
“My mom worked at my gym when I was little, and I would jump in here over and over again while I waited for her. It’s nice.”
“My bed, or hell, your bed is nice.”
“Man, you’re so crabby,” I accuse.
He mumbles something unintelligible before looking over at me. “I suck.”
My face scrunches up. “Never.”
“My stupid stick broke.”
“I’m sorry. Do you want me to buy you another?”
He shakes his head. “No, and I hate that we lost.”
“Yeah, that does suck.”
He lets out a loud groan before covering his face. “I don’t know, Sof. I’m stressing.”
“Stressing about what?” I ask. This is what I wanted. I didn’t want him to hide his feelings in bed as we felt each other up. I want him to tell me why he looks stricken, and I will help him. I’ve been knocked down. I’ve been on top. I’ve done it all. I’ve got him. He just has to let me in.
“Coach is a dick, and he’s really on me. I want his guidance, don’t get me wrong, but he really let me have it after that goal.”
I purse my lips. “Aren’t you supposed to score?”
“Yeah, but he wanted me off the ice. I had been worried about the change, and I didn’t listen,” he says, and then he sighs. “I don’t know, babe. I just feel a little off. Like something isn’t right.”
“What do you mean?”
He doesn’t look at me; he just slowly shakes his head. “I’ve been playing for this team, on varsity, for four years now, and I haven’t ever been offered a meeting with a team.”
“Do you need that?”
He closes his eyes. “Yeah, and I think I’ve been ignoring it. I think I’ve trusted Coach and my agent that they’ll come for me. That the scouts are watching me. Fuck, maybe I should have gone into the EHL.”
“EHL?”
“Eastern Hockey League. It’s like two tiers down from the NHL but one step up from college. I was offered a contract with an affiliate of the Assassins, but I wanted more. Maybe I was selfish.”
“Why did you say no?”
“I figured why give up college when I can play here, wait, and get my degree.”
“Well, I think that’s smart,” I say, but he shakes his head.
“But what if that was my chance?”
“Well, you can’t go back, so no point heading that way.”
He bites his lip, and I think he’s ignoring my uplifting saying. “I just want to get into the NHL.”
“And nothing is saying you won’t. This is all in your head.”
“But…” His words drop off, and I watch him. He is usually so confident, so sure of himself, but right now, he just looks broken. It seems like he’s been this way more often than not. “Moon came up to me and told me he has a meeting with the IceCats from South Carolina. I want that. Even a shit team like the IceCats, I’d take it. I just want to get in.”
Ah, the root of the problem. It wasn’t the loss; it’s jealousy. I understand that. “That sucks.”
“It does.”
