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Her hand covers mine as I try to wipe her tears away. “I love you, Jude.”
I kiss her then. Hard and with all of myself as we cling to each other. As we part, I slide my nose along hers, kissing and moving my lips with hers. “I love you, Claire. We are okay. It’s not even a for-real negative.”
“The test says it can tell five days sooner.”
“The test is shit, and I don’t care what it says. Until the doctor tells me no, then I’m not going to stress. Wanna know why?”
“Why?”
“Because, in all honesty, it doesn’t matter. We tried again because we could. If it happens, it happens. If it doesn’t, then we try again or find a surrogate. When you’re done with it all, then we’re done. But during all that time, we’ll be raising our son.”
Her eyes are swimming in tears as she nods. She swallows hard as she leans into me, kissing my top lip. “Okay.”
“Okay,” I agree as I kiss her once more, and then I hear her phone ringing. “Is that your phone?”
She lets me go to rush to it. “Tristan? Hey!” I watch as her eyes widen. “You’re at seven, and they just broke your water? Oh my God. We’re on the way.”
She hangs up the phone and then looks at me, fear, excitement, and nerves floating in her blue depths. “Tristan went in for a checkup and has apparently been contracting all night. She’s at seven. We gotta go.”
I feel a little dizzy. “Ten is when the baby comes?”
“Yup,” she says, grabbing the bag she’s packed for the baby. She looks back at me, her brows shooting up. “Let’s go.”
“Get our baby.”
Her eyes light up. “Yeah.”
She reaches for my hand, and I take hers.
And we leave to go meet our son.
* * *
When Claire opens the door and I see a screaming Tristan on the other side, my stomach drops. I thought this would go slowly, but apparently, from what Claire gathered on the way here, there wasn’t time for drugs, and Tristan is about to do this all natural. Not sure how I feel about that, but it isn’t my body or my choice. I just want her and the baby to be safe. From the sounds of it, I don’t know if that’s gonna happen.
God bless her, this must hurt, because her screaming is at a level I’ve never heard before. Claire rushes to Tristan’s side quickly as the nurse asks for our names and verifies who we are. As I get a name tag slapped on my shirt, I look around the room to find only staff, Tristan, and Claire. I was sort of hoping Tristan’s mom would have shown up, but Claire wasn’t really sure if Tristan had told her mom or not. Maybe she’s in the waiting room where our lawyer is waiting.
Holy shit. This is really happening.
Claire is on it, holding Tristan’s hand as I stand there like a complete idiot. Things are moving around me, they’re setting up a table, and there is a lot of talking around the screaming. Tristan looks terrified and sweaty. Claire is stunning and ready to take charge. Then there’s me, just standing here.
“Scoot to the edge of the table.”
Tristan does as the doctor asks, and I get one hell of a view of a vagina that is not my wife’s. I let out a little cry of distress before I rush to the other side of Tristan. “Just saw more of you than I wanted.”
“And I don’t even care,” she yells, and I nod as she suddenly takes my hand. “I don’t care what you see or feel. I need you to hold my hand.”
“Done.”
It all goes so damn fast. Everyone is moving, Tristan is screaming, Claire is a supportive rock star, and I feel lost. This woman isn’t my wife, and I feel awful for her. She’s all alone. She only has us, and she’s giving us her baby. Something clicks inside me, and I jump into action. I hold her leg, her hand, and tell her how strong she is. I thank her as the tears fall from her eyes, and then she starts to push.
“You’re doing so awesome, Tris. You’re almost there,” Claire urges, and when our eyes meet, my heart swells. She’s so excited. So beautiful. Jesus, I love her.
“You got this, Tristan. You’re kicking ass,” I cheer, and then I hear it.
The cry.
One from Tristan and then one from the bloody, wiggly little human she expelled from her body. The doctor holds up my son and shows us. Tears gather in my eyes as my body shakes with nerves. That’s my son. I look at Claire just as she looks at me, and soon, we’re both crying.
