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“We love you,” I say, cupping her face.
Her eyes are swimming in tears, and they hurt me. I want to stay here in Minnesota and help her, be there for her, but I know she won’t let me. She’s strong, she’s independent, and she’s brilliant.
“I’m going to be okay.”
“I know,” I say, and I grin. “You were reading my mind, huh?”
She smiles back. “I know that look, that mothering, I have to help her look. I love it, and I swear it’s what assures me that Harrison needed you.”
My heart swells, almost knocking the breath out of me.
“I remember looking into your eyes and being like, ‘Man, this chick can do anything and save the world. She needs to be a mother.’ And now you are.”
I can’t breathe or even speak. I wrap my arms around her, and she hugs me tightly.
When there is a knock at the door, we part to see Jude coming in with a white bundle tucked in his arm. “I broke him out. They kept poking him and shit. It was rude.”
Tristan laughs as I wipe my face. When she looks up at me, her brows come in. “What?”
“Can we have a picture of the four of us?”
A slow smile covers her pretty face. “Yes, of course.”
She hits the call button as Jude hands Harrison to me. A nurse comes in, and Tristan asks, “Can you take a picture of us?”
“Yes! I would love to.”
I sit on the side of the bed, and Tristan leans into me as Jude comes to cuddle in close to us. Tristan reaches over, moving the blanket out of Harrison’s face, and then she looks up at me. “He’s gorgeous.”
“He’s perfect,” I agree, and she grins, tears in her eyes.
“You guys are going to be the best parents in the world.”
“Because of you,” I whisper, and then I lean my head into hers.
We then look at the phone Jude has handed the nurse, and once I hear the click of the camera, I know this picture is going in the living room.
For it’s of the day our dreams came true.
Harrison River Phillip Sinclair
Jude
“You’re like two weeks old. How are you shitting so much?”
There are only half of the wipes left in the box, and I have two diapers on my shoulders. One that I’ll mess up and then the one that will work. Naked as the day he was born, Harrison looks up at me with his dark eyes, probably trying to figure out what the hell I am doing.
Makes two of us.
“Poo-poo!” Claire yells from the other room, and I roll my eyes as my son looks up at me like he knows I have no clue what the fuck is going on.
I don’t.
You’d think with all the practice I’ve had with my nieces and nephews, I’d have this. Truth is, I’ve never changed a diaper. I didn’t tell Claire that, though. I just YouTubed a few things and demanded to be a daddy. I have to get in where I fit in because when I leave for the road, this will all be on Claire, and I want the experiences. I want it all.
I’m a fucking dad.
So cool.
