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Her brow perks. “What if he is hiding his feelings?”
I shake my head. “Mom, how he found out Jasmine was a lesbian was because she wanted to bring me in bed with them. He lost his shit and said he wouldn’t sleep with me. Pretty sure that means he isn’t attracted to me.”
A look of pure distress covers her face. “I’d rather not know that kind of stuff.”
I snort. “Then keep your thoughts to yourself.”
She doesn’t say anything for a moment, and I can see the wheels turning in her head. I know she loves Asher. But a part of me feels she only wants me to be with him because then I wouldn’t get with such idiots who break my heart or try to make me move away. She knows I’d be taken care of, and of course, I want that too. But for that to happen, Asher would have to show some kind of interest, and I don’t even know if I’d go for it then.
We have a great relationship. Do I really want to throw sex and jealousy in the mix? Well, there is already jealousy. I really hope Angie doesn’t approach him. I don’t even know why I told him about her. I’m so fucked up in the head.
“Plus, I’m having dinner with Taco this week. That will probably start up again.”
Her eyes widen, and I almost wish I’d told her I was pregnant instead. Why did I tell her about that? Am I that unwilling to discuss the fact that the guy I’ve loved for most of my adult life doesn’t want anything to do with me?
I think I am.
“I’m sorry, what did you say?”
I blink. “Nothing?” She gives me a dark look, and I crumble like a cookie. “I’m having dinner with Taco tomorrow.”
“Allison, please tell me you’re lying,” she says, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Just lie to me if you have to.”
“Yup, I’m lying.”
I should have known it wouldn’t be that easy. She drops her hand and glares at me. “I am flabbergasted that you want to see that person. He wanted nothing more than to ruin your life. You do realize this, right?”
I let my shoulders fall, chewing a bite of sandwich as I try to think of what to say. I probably should have kept talking about Asher. “Mom, it’s not that simple. I do care for him.”
“No, no, you do not. You want to try to get rid of your feelings for Asher. It’s so bad you choose dudes who don’t know their asses from their mouths, and they’re jackasses!”
I blink. “That’s very graphic, Mom.”
She shoots me a contemptuous look. “Allison, sweetheart, he doesn’t love you. He just wants to keep getting in your pants.”
I press my lips together. “And what’s wrong with that? It’s nice to be wanted.”
She looks so sad for me, and I feel pathetic. “You’re better than that, sweetheart. Even when I slept around, at least I did it with decent guys.”
We have a very open relationship. I know I can talk to her about anything, and I know her past. I set her with a look. “How can you be sure of that, though? You sometimes didn’t even get to know them.”
She shrugs. “Well, that could be true, but I can promise you they had jobs and didn’t go by stupid nicknames.”
I sigh. “I don’t know, Mom. He’s familiar.”
“So is Asher.”
I roll my eyes. “We’ve discussed that, and there is no point. He isn’t attracted to me.”
She holds my gaze, her blue eyes searching mine. “Please don’t get back with Taco. Life is so good for you right now. Plus, I’m sure Asher has had words with you about this.”
I press my lips together. “Of course, Asher doesn’t want me back with him, but it’s for obvious reasons, because he doesn’t treat me right.”
“Yes, so please listen to us. I get a guy being good in bed, but sometimes their dick isn’t good enough when they are a dick.”
“Man, I love walking in on y’all’s conversations,” my dad says, and my face burns. “And you better not be talking about me,” he says to my mom jokingly, kissing her temple.
I gag a bit. “Ew.”
