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“Because I was in New York and time zones are confusing.”
“Okay, so we’re even. I need to talk.”
“At three?”
“At three.”
“Ugh, what? Did your other eye fall out? Did you get into another fight with Nacho?”
I scoff. “No, but I slept with his ex, who is also my best friend and now…my girlfriend? Shit, how did this happen?”
“No fucking way. I don’t believe you.”
“Why do you think I’m calling you from her phone?”
I’m met with silence. “Holy shit, you did?”
“Yeah,” I say and almost proudly. “Dude, I don’t know why I waited so long. I could have avoided all that time with Jasmine.”
“I’m impressed. I never thought you would find the balls to do it.”
I roll my eyes. “What does that mean?”
“Means you like being in an easy, comfortable, and controllable situation, and this is not that, my brother. This is adding sex to a solid relationship that didn’t need sex. This could mean ‘Oh no, real feelings.’”
I exhale heavily. “I know. I’m terrified.”
“Jesus. I can’t stand you,” he says, exasperated. “You gave me so much shit to leave my fucking-around ways behind, yet you have never ever felt anything for anyone.”
“That’s not true. I cared for Jasmine.”
“Cared for is not love, Asher. You only wanted to marry her because she liked Star Wars and made good food. You never loved her.”
“I know,” I admit. I feel like such an ass. “I wanted to, but I didn’t. I’ve never told anyone that. I think I’m high.”
He scoffs. “You’re not. You’re just feeling things you’ve never felt.”
I let my head fall into my palms. “I know, and I’m freaking the shit out. Make it better. It’s your job.”
“Want my advice?”
“Yes. That’s the reason I’m calling.”
He pauses, sucking in a deep breath. “You need to tell Ally you’re scared because, with her, you could fall in love. You’ve probably already been in love with her, but you’ve told yourself it’s in a just-friends way. And now, it’s about to be different.”
I close my eyes. “She’s going to think I’m a fucking idiot.”
“Well, that’s a give
n. We all do,” he says simply. “I mean, you had everyone fooled with Jasmine but me—”
I lift my head and glare at the wall. “You only know because you got me drunk right after she dumped me.”
“Maybe so, but everyone knows you have real feelings for Ally. Unlike you, we can’t all ignore the sparks that fly between you two.”
“So many sparks,” I agree, swallowing hard. “They’re intense.”
“Exactly, and with Ally, it’s all or nothing. There is no hiding feelings or ignoring them or not wanting them. You will feel them, and you will have to learn to give that part of you to her.”
