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He rolls his eyes, annoyed. “You guys think I’m not upset? I like that guy. But as a thank-you and a punishment, the whole hockey team will be here to clean and move mats for the meet tomorrow. So really, I did this for you guys. And instead of setting up after practice tomorrow, it’ll be done for us. Wow. Thanks, Coach. We love you. You are the best. We shall bring you coffee and donuts as payment for all the lovely things you do for us.”

Together, we repeat what he says, much to his pleasure. He grins, mouthing with us before he points his finger. “Weak ankle crew, go on and get taped. Rest of you, let’s warm up.”

Of course, we’re all complaining once we leave the taping room. After being spoiled by Evan for the last couple weeks, we don’t like how we’re taped. I hate it so much, I retape once I miss my vault. I might take a whole lot of steps when I go to land, but I don’t fall. I blame that on not being able to feel my feet. I need those to land, obviously. Even with my mind flooded with thoughts of Evan and wondering if I should DM him, I actually have a solid damn practice.

Before competitions, Coach brings in a judge—whom he’s currently sleeping with—and has her grade us. She may be getting it from Coach, but she doesn’t let things slide. She’s a stickler, but even so, I got great opening season scores. I just hope I can earn them tomorrow when fans, students, and my family are here.

We aren’t allowed to have our phones out during practice, and I will not admit how quickly I run to get my phone at the end. Unfortunately, there is nothing from Evan, but Aviva texted to tell me what time they’re flying in and how they want to meet me for lunch. I answer back quickly to let her know to call or text, and I’ll be ready. Once I get the tape off my ankles, I put on my pants just as the hockey team starts to enter. I thought we’d be released, but instead, they’re the muscle and we’re the brains.

Usually, it takes a couple hours for us to set up for a meet. Mats weigh a lot, but with the guys, we have it done in an hour. It’s trippy to be done so early, but I’m stoked for sure. A different team of people comes in and sets up the competition equipment, but the biggest part is the mats and carrying out the other equipment. We’re not allowed to put anything together since they could accuse us of cheating or whatever. So Coach brings in an outside club to set up. It’s too big of a drain on our funds for them to move mats, so we do it. I’m used to it. When I came here, I realized not everyone’s gymnastics career had been like mine. I didn’t have parents with money to support all the expenses. Aviva and I had to work in the gym to afford the sport. I don’t regret anything, though. I think it makes me stronger, but everyone else complains a lot.

I take a long pull of my water, out of breath from helping clean under the bleachers, that I then open to set up for our fans. Cameron comes to stand beside me, leaning into me as she inhales her Celsius drink. I hate the sparkling ones, but she loves them, so I can’t ever steal them from her. “I’m not trying to get you more in your feelings, but why isn’t Evan here? I get they traded services and all, but he’s our dude, and we’ve been training him to do this.”

I swallow hard. “I’ve been thinking the same thing, but I’m trying not to think it’s because of me.”

She seems to think it is my fault, and that’s fanfuckingtastic. My heart skips a beat or six as I take another pull of my water. “But surely not. Maybe Evan has something to do?”

God bless this girl, she’s trying.

Before I can thank her for being so supportive, Benny is there. I’m a little taken aback since he showed up like a ninja, but none of that matters when he says, “Evan Adler? No, he passed out. His father came to get him.”

Cameron and I both look at him, confused. “Passed out?” I ask. “Is he okay?”

He shrugs. “His family is worried, so I’m not sure.”

I look at Cameron as she looks at me before looking at Benny. “Why did he pass out?”

“He has mental problems and had a panic attack.”

My heart drops into my stomach.

“But don’t say anything. It is all being kept on the down-low, but you two are my friends.”

Cameron looks back at me, and I hold her gaze, unsure what to think. But what I feel? I’m freaking the hell out with worry, and I have decided I’m not sliding into his DMs.

I’m calling Aviva.

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