Page 36 of The British Bastard


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"Hey, Catriona," she says, though she seems unsure of how to pronounce my name. "Glad we bumped into each other again."

"I have nothing to say to you."

"Oh, I don't want to have a conversation. Where is Alex, anyway?"

"How do you know our names? We never told you."

She smiles. "I have connections, hon. That time when I saw Alex on the street, he turned me down when I offered him another chance to screw me. But I bumped into another guy, somebody who was more than happy to get tangled in the sheets with me, no strings attached."

"Is there a point to your story? I donnae care if you shag every man in the city."

"Here comes the point, hon." She sidles a wee bit closer. "The man I screwed in my hotel room that day turned out to be powerful. He hooked me up with a sweet bachelorette pad, and we've been doing the nasty twice a week ever since."

I've had enough of this. I rise and smooth my blouse.

"Oh, you can't go yet," she says. "Sit down, Catriona. My name is Gloria Harris, by the way. We should be on a first-name basis considering what I want from you."

"Which is what?"

"Alex. I want to fuck him again, on a regular basis. My new lover is good, but Alex was better."

"You are off your head."

Just as she opens her mouth to speak again, Alex strides out of the shop carrying a small bag. He halts beside me and narrows his gaze on Gloria. "What are you doing here?"

"Having a girl chat with Catriona."

"Bugger off. Neither of us has anything to say to you."

"Come on, baby—"

"Leave now," he says in the nastiest tone I've ever heard. "Go, or I will force you to do it."

Gloria raises her hands. "Okay, okay. I'll go. But we'll be seeing each other again."

She ambles down the pavement and eventually disappears from our view.

"What did that slag say to you?" Alex asks.

"That she lives here now, and she has a powerful lover. Oh, and she wants to shag you."

He grunts. "Don't worry about her. She is clearly a very unhappy woman." He offers me the bag he'd been carrying. "Here's your surprise."

I pull out the items inside the bag—two teddy bears, a boy and a girl. The girl is dressed in a white T-shirt that has the Scottish flag printed on it while the boy's shirt features the British flag. I can't help laughing. "Thank you, Alex. You are so sweet."

He hooks an arm around my waist. "If ever I'm not here to cuddle with you, these bears will fill in for me."

I kiss his cheek. "This was very thoughtful."

As we head for home, I wonder about his statement. Why wouldn't he always be here with me? He must've meant that if I go on another excavation, or if he goes on a trip, I can use the bears as a fuzzy surrogate.

Aye, that must be what he meant. Isn't it?

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