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Chapter Forty Two
*****
Katie
My forehead felt wet as my eyes slowly opened. Raising my hand, I could feel a washcloth on my head. My brain was trying to process everything and make sense of what was going on, but all it left me with was a pounding in my skull.
“You okay?”
I could swear the voice was Nate’s, but it was impossible. This was some sort of cruel joke that Asher had set up. Sitting up, I removed the cloth from my head. We were alone in the living room. He stood across the room, looking at the ornaments on the Christmas tree. The sparkle of the tree distracted my vision as Nate moved and sat down next to me.
“Katie, please say something.”
Moving his hands over mine, I quickly recoiled. This couldn’t be Nate. Nate was gone. Being met by complete silence, he looked down, obviously hurt that I wouldn’t let him touch me.
“Ok, then I will. I’m so sorry, Katie. For everything. I’m sorry I didn’t tell Asher about us, that I let you walk out of the room, for going up on that plane, and for not coming back sooner. Katie, I’m sorry for everything I have put you through the last few months. But most of all, I’m sorry that I never told you how much I loved you. That you are the most beautiful person I have ever met in my life. A life without you is the most torturous thing I have ever had to go through. I don’t want to live a life without you.”
I sat silently for five minutes with him just looking at me nervously. Neither of us dared to move. My eyes were glued looking down at my hands resting in my lap. Not that I didn’t know what to say, it was that there were so many things I didn’t know where to start.
I had spent the last four months thinking of everything I would want to say to him if he were alive. To apologize for being immature, for telling Asher the way I had, for not understanding his side of everything and always pushing him away. I wanted to pull him in close and never let him go.
Instead of saying anything of merit, I just started crying. The number of tears I had shed since he went missing was astonishing. There were moments I was sure I would have died of dehydration and that I would run out of tears. My head fell into my hands, attempting to control my breathing so I didn’t pass out again.
“Katie, can I hug you?”
His voice was low. Where he usually sounded confident, there was only a voice of uncertainty and fear as he asked. Falling into him, he wrapped his arms around me, tucking me into his side. When I finally gained control of myself, I pulled back. His arms didn’t immediately let go and I couldn’t blame him for not wanting to release me. There was a part of me that didn’t want him to let go either.
“Why didn’t you come back?”
My voice was barely above a whisper.
“I came back as soon as I could.”
*****
Nate
Starting at the beginning, I told her everything. Even the details I wanted to leave out, like kissing Savannah. I needed to be honest with her, even if it hurt to tell her I had kissed someone else. Doing my best, I let her know that more than she could ever know, I regretted it. However, had it not been for that moment, who knows when I would have remembered.
Just as everyone else had done, she sat in silence as I spoke. When I finished, I stared at her, inspecting every inch of her expression. Taking in a deep breath, my worst fears were being confirmed. She wasn’t still in love with me; she would not welcome me back in, especially after kissing another person. Rising to my feet, my entire body felt like fractured glass. I couldn’t look back as I started toward the door, knowing that seeing her face would shatter me. I would text Asher later and thank him for helping me, but it just wasn’t enough.
Feeling fingers wrap themselves around the crook of my elbow, holding me in place. A chill rushed through my body. My mind raced back to the night in the hotel. Her fingers holding me from leaving then too.
“Nate, wait.”
Freezing in place, I waited in hopes she would say something else. As she walked in front of me, my head lifted as my eyes looked over her; refusing to look directly at her. She didn’t need to see me breaking. Her body pressed against mine as she reached her hand up, looping it around my neck, pulling me down to her. Before I could think, she was in my arms, our lips pressing against one another hard.
Kissing her was like finally being able to breathe. Hearing footsteps from behind us, I quickly lowered Katie back to her feet. Adjusting myself before I turned, I found Asher standing in the doorway with a smile across his face.
“So, can the rest of us come back yet? It’s been over an hour, and Bridget is getting restless to find out if she’s taking you back.”
I hadn’t realized how much I missed the relationship the three of us shared. He always had a way of talking about Katie right in front of her, like she wasn’t there.
“Yes. I think we can pick this back up later.”
Sticking his finger in his mouth, he pretended to gag himself.
“Ugh, ground rules. I don’t need to hear about it or see anything between you two.”
