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“Exactly!” Sammy threw his hands up in the air. “I knew what you were going to say, Liv. I could tell by your reaction every time I brought it up. You were going to say no to your company and put your job at risk. I couldn’t let you do that.”
Olivia’s cheeks flamed with fury. “It. Was. My. Decision.”
“And this is our relationship,” he fired back. He rubbed a hand over his face. “Look, I’m sorry I went behind your back. It was shitty of me. But if you’d said no, they would’ve denied your transfer request. They might’ve even fired you. That wouldn’t have helped us, either.”
“So what? We keep dating and keep our relationship secret, hoping none of my coworkers see us and no crazy fans sneak more photos of us and post them online?” Olivia shook her head. “How long can we keep that going before it all falls apart?”
San Francisco was a big city, but unless she and Sammy never went out together again, the risk remained.
Sammy stared at her, his expression tortured.
A chill crawled up her spine and dug its icy claws into her organs, freezing her from the inside out. “You want to actually break up.”
“Liv...” He reached for her, but she backed away, her chest caving in on itself.
“I can’t believe it.” Every word scraped against her throat on its way out. “I can’t believe you’re giving up so easily. All that talk about us being honest and working things out together, that was allbullshit.Because if it’d been true, we wouldn’t be having this conversation after one fucking obstacle.” Moisture gathered behind her eyes, and Olivia didn’t bother stemming the tide as tears leaked down her cheeks in salty rivulets. “You didn’t even ask me what I wanted. If you had, you’d know I would’ve chosen you. I could always find another job. I’ll never be able to find another us.”
If Sammy had given her any sign that he was willing to make this work, Olivia would’ve gone back to Michael and told him she’d changed her mind—and taken any fallout that came with it. Because she’d come to a conclusion these past few weeks: she’d choose Sammy over anything. Yes, her career meant a lot to her; she’d never throw it away willy-nilly. But she’d be able to find a similar job ifPHC let her go. She might have to work her way up again and throw her original five-year plan in the trash, but it would’ve been worth it.
Yet Sammy hadn’t given her that chance. He’d decided for her, and if that weren’t bad enough, he seemed perfectly willing and ready to end their relationship with no discussion whatsoever.
Pain raked across his features. “I don’t want to do this, Liv,” he said, his voice tight with emotion. “You think Iwantto give you up? You mean the fucking world to me, and the thought of not being with you—” He exhaled a shuddering breath. “But I also don’t want to hold you back. I don’t want you to resent me—us—down the road, and that’s what would’ve happened. You love Pine Hill—maybe not the SF office, but the company. You’ve worked so hard and are so close to your dream. I can’t let you throw that away for me. You might be willing to make that sacrifice, but I’m not.”
A wild laugh bubbled out of Olivia’s throat. “I’m not a child, Sammy. I don’t need you to decide what’s best for me. But you know what?” Her pulse thundered in her ears, and she swallowed back the urge to vomit. “Maybe you did do the right thing. At least now I know where we stand, and how hard you’re willing to fight for us.”
Which was to say, not at all.
She needed to get out of here. The walls were closing in, and it was getting harder and harder to breathe. If she didn’t get fresh air soon, she might faint.
Olivia ducked her head and shouldered her way past Sammy, trying to keep the pieces of heart together until she was far enough away to break down in peace.
He tried reaching for her again, but she shrugged him off.
“Liv, please.” Sammy’s voice broke. He sounded devastated.Good.“Don’t—”
She tuned him out and quickened her pace until she was outside, where she ran. She ran and ran until the oxygen in her lungs dwindled and her legs turned to jelly from pumping up and down the hilly streets surrounding Sammy’s house. She ran like she could somehow escape reality, but when she collapsed on the bench in a nearby park—mentally, emotionally, and physically drained—there was reality, staring her in the face and smirking like the inescapable bastard it was.
Olivia sniffled and wiped her face with the back of her hand, ignoring the concerned looks from passersby.
Her phone rang. She was tempted to ignore it, but conditioning overrode her instincts. A pathetic part of her hoped it was Sammy; instead, she saw her sister’s name flashing on the screen.
Fuck.Olivia still hadn’t told Alina about Richard’s come-on at brunch. She’d meant to, but she kept making excuses and pushing it off because it was one talk shereallydidn’t want to have.
“Hello?” Olivia attempted to steady her voice. She wouldn’t tell Alina about Richard now, either. She would, eventually, but she didn’t have the capacity for another tough conversation today.
There was a short pause. “You sound different.”
“I’m getting sick,” Olivia lied. She’d never told Alina about her and Sammy’s rekindled relationship, either. She’d madethatmistake before.
“Drink some tea and honey; it helps. Anyway, I wanted to make sure you received my email about wedding logistics. I need you to tell me what entrance song you want for the reception and which hairstyle option you prefer...”
While Alina rattled through Olivia’s to-do items, Olivia stared straight ahead, numb.
She found it hard to care about Alina’s wedding.
She found it hard to care about anything at all.
