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“Pfft. From what? You? Your world?”
Finally, she was getting it. “Exactly.”
“So, will you take her car away to protect her from road accidents? Will you stop her from eating corndogs because she might get cancer one day?”
Stubborn old bat. “That’s not the same.”
“Life can be really short, kid. I wouldn’t trade my time with my Charlie for anything…even with all the scary shit his life brought me. I’d make the same decision over and over again, no matter how many times my life was in danger.”
I doubted Lila would do the same. “Then he was the coward for sucking you into his life.”
“Charlie was no coward. Believe me, he tried to push me away, but I wouldn’t let him rob me of my ability to make my own decisions. My life would have been different without him. Safer? Maybe. Mundane and dull? Absolutely. I’d have never loved as deeply. He was the only one for me. Loving without passion, now that’s the biggest crime of all. Without him, my life would have felt empty.”
She stood up and shuffled to her room without another word.
I stared at Lila’s bedroom door. It was ajar, and a sliver of pale light escaped from it. Was that an invitation? I’d spent the weekend naked in a bed with her, but going intoherbedroom seemed far more intimate.
I glanced at the exit.
Which was more cowardly? Staying or leaving?
Which was better for her? And was it right for me to make that decision? I’d never thought of it that way.
I had been robbed of my choices since I was born. And now I was stuck in a life I hadn’t chosen. One I didn’t want.
Was I doing the same to Lila?
