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Chapter 50
Coping
Clayton
I tighten my arms around Sid’s waist as I rest my cheek against the top of her head. I needed this. Some time to think about what all happened tonight.
My father refused to talk about his prognosis. After having a drink, he dismissed us from his office without any further discussion of his condition. I needed to get out of there. I grabbed Sid and left. It was her idea to come here.
This view of the Hudson and the city has gone a long way to calm me. Along with having my wife in my arms. Correction, my wife and our growing child.
I lean back against the grill of the SUV and look down at her. She peers up at me with so much concern in her eyes. I love this woman so much.
“I think he’s done it all out of love. Even keeping his secret,” she says.
I close my eyes and nod. Guilt consumes me. It was my idea to break away and go out on our own. Would things be different if I didn’t?
“Hey, I don’t think your father wanted you to be anyone other than who you are. He’s proud of you all. Don’t beat yourself up. Cherish the time you still have and support him through this.”
I lean in and capture her lips. I deepen the kiss as she wraps her arms around my neck. Breaking the kiss, I then place my forehead to hers.
“All of his bullshit led me to you and this one,” I say, placing my hand over her belly. “I’ll think about forgiving him. In time.”
“Time is the one thing none of us are guaranteed.”
I peck her lips. “Which is why I don’t want to waste another minute not making love to my wife. Come on, let’s go home.”
“Can we stop for some ice cream and fruit?”
“I’ll run to the store by the house once we’re there. You can go upstairs.”
* * *
Cane
“Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse,” I grunt into my hands.
Ally places her palm on my back beneath my suit jacket and starts to rub soothing circles. I turn to look into her eyes. They’re blue from the contacts she has in. I hate it.
She’s still gorgeous, but it’s not her. Just like the dark curly wig isn’t her. My wife shouldn’t have to hide. I thought I had this handled, but I’m so far in over my head, I feel like I’m drowning.
The only thing I know for sure is that I’m going to fix this. I’m going to burn down every motherfucker I have to until she’s safe and I’m going to be a father to the child of the woman I love.
“He’s going to be okay. Your dad is strong. He’s a fighter. I know he’s going to be okay.”
I cup the side of her face. “Are you going to be okay? Are you ready to tell Chloe the truth about us?”
She drops her eyes away from me and frowns. Right, because I’m not good enough. I hate the day I first lifted that white powder to my nose. It has fucked up everything in my life since.
“Never mind,” I scoff and move to climb out of the SUV.
After stopping with Ally for smoothies, I asked the driver to park a block away from the penthouse, not ready to go inside. I needed a moment to think.
“Cane, wait,” Ally calls out as she gets out to follow me.
I spin on her. “Why? It’s clear I don’t matter to you. I’m not good enough, I get it. You can’t bear to bring yourself to tell your sister you married a fuckup like me.”
“Really, Cane? Really?”
