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His hands were on my bare back, holding onto me, pressing my body against his. It caused a low, almost painful ache in my abdomen, but I didn’t care. If pain had to mingle with pleasure, so be it. I’d already lived three years in the shadows, letting the pain of the past control me. I was done with it. So fucking done.
Everything I was, I put into that kiss. Everything I could be, everything I wanted to be. I was my father’s daughter, after all. I was a Santos, and therefore I would take what I wanted, no matter what the consequences would be. If Zander ran and tattled on me, if he was just a spy for my father, then I would deal with it when the time came. I just wanted to live in the moment right now, and this particular moment told me to have some sore lips.
Kissing Zander was easy. It felt right. All the time we’d spent together, the things we’d shared, it had all led up to this. Out of habit, a small part of me still wanted to pull back, but the bigger part of me wanted this, craved this, yearned for this and more.
What would being with Zander be like on a more intimate level? What would he be like as a lover? I wondered. Would he be quiet and dominant like the dragon man from the Playground, or would he be a different kind of lover? That was not something I ever imagined myself thinking about, and yet here we were.
Zander was the one who pulled away first, breathing hard. “We should finish getting you dressed and get out of here. If we keep going…” Though he didn’t say it, I was pretty sure we both knew where he was going with that; a telltale hardness had started to grow between his legs.
Yeah, he was probably right. We should finish getting me dressed, grab what we needed to, and then get the hell out of here and never look back. I didn’t know about him, but I was done being locked up in this sterile room. At least it was full of flowers now, but still. Not a place I’d call a fun time.
I let my hands drop to my sides, and Zander’s eyes fell to my chest, which, until then, I’d forgotten was bared. Now that I didn’t have the hospital gown to cover myself with, my tits and my nipples—which had either grown pointed thanks to the chilly air or the passionate kiss we’d shared—were out in plain sight.
And Zander stared at them for a long minute before he was able to force himself to turn away, move around me, and grab my bra off the bed. Right. Probably best to put those away before he got any other ideas.
As he helped me slide my arms into the straps, as he walked around me to do the clasp, I couldn’t fight the heat that crept over me. The way Zander had looked at me, like I was the most beautiful girl he’d ever seen, made me feel some type of way. He wasn’t lying when he’d told me his feelings for me; I knew it beyond a shadow of a doubt.
Neither Zander nor I spoke as he finished helping me into my clothes. He was tender the whole time, soft and gentle, which I appreciated. Once my intimate areas were covered by a bra and panties, his gaze lingered on the bandage on my stomach, but he didn’t say a single word. I appreciated that.
Once I was fully dressed, shoes on, Zander went to grab my prescription paper that we’d have to take to the pharmacy on the way home. There was one in the hospital we could stop at, but I preferred to get the hell out of here as quickly as possible. He surveyed the multiple flower arrangements that had been given to me. “Is there anything you want out of these, or do we leave them?”
I didn’t really care about the flowers, but there were two things I wanted to take. I slowly walked to the bed, reaching underneath my pillow to grab the get well card from Atlas. Don’t ask me why, but I wanted to keep it, maybe as a reminder that I wasn’t really safe anywhere in this city. Atlas had found me, and it was only a matter of time until he sent more of his men after me—and I wasn’t banking on Ezekiel taking care of them all for me.
After sliding it into my pocket, I glanced over to the flowers. “Uh, yeah, grab the bear.”
Zander’s brown eyebrows lifted, and he said not a word as he reached for the bear to pick it up. Though he didn’t say anything, I knew what he was thinking.
“Don’t,” I warned, giving him a glare as he walked over to me and handed me the bear. The fabric was just as soft as I remembered it being, and Luca’s face flashed in my head. He’d visited me a lot these past few days, more than anyone else. I didn’t know if I’d say I enjoyed his company, because sometimes his face still reminded me of his father’s, but I also wouldn’t say that I hated it.
“What? I didn’t say anything.”
“You didn’t have to.” The pointed look Zander gave me at that made me chuckle—and the chuckle made my insides hurt a bit, so I stopped. “Don’t be jealous.”
“I’m not jealous,” Zander spoke, saying it a little too quickly to be believable.
“You are.”
Zander huffed, offering me his arm. The hospital had given me a wheelchair to take out, but after a hell of a lot of insistence, they’d agreed to let me walk out. I had to sign something that said I was forgoing it, probably so the hospital could have it so they weren’t liable if, say, I tripped and fell and fucked everything up on the way out.
I took his arm. We’d just kissed, so maybe it was because the touch of his lips on mine lingered, but I didn’t mind it. My hand gripped his strong arm, my other holding onto the teddy bear Luca had given me. Together, we headed out.
Down the hall we went, and Zander muttered under his breath, “I don’t like that Luca.”
That much was obvious. Anytime he was near, Zander got all alpha and protective of me, like I was his girlfriend and I’d asked him to do so. Couldn’t be further from the truth, but that never seemed to stop him.
“Luca is… nice,” I said. He seemed nice, anyway. Much nicer than his father, although I was well aware it could all be a lie, a show he put on for me in order to get close to me. “I don’t mind him.”
Zander scoffed. “You don’t mind him? Please. Luca trips over his own feet when he’s with you, and you might act like you’re not impressed, but I can see it. You’re attracted to him.” He whispered all of this while we waited for an elevator.
Now it was my turn to scoff. “So what if I am?”
“I don’t trust him.”
I gave him a look, and right then the elevator doors slid open and we walked inside. Zander hit the G button, for the ground floor, and I said, “You don’t have to trust him. You don’t even have to like him.” I swallowed, looking down at my feet, pushing out the thought of Rocco and what he did to me three years ago. “His father, on the other hand… I don’t ever want to be alone with him.”
That got Zander to give me a quizzical look. “What do you mean?”
“Nothing,” I said with a forced smile and a shake of my head. “Nothing at all. Just… don’t be all alpha to Luca, okay? I don’t want to make any enemies. As it is, we already have to be on guard for who shot me. You… you aren’t going to tell my father about the Playground, are you?”
