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Everest
Sittinginthecar makes me nervous, but not as nervous as I would be if I were in the damned grocery shop. “Don’t go in there, Everie, just stay in here,” I reassure myself, but then sitting in the car is not making this any better.
I tentatively get out of the SUV and walk to the door. The grocery store doors open up, but I don’t walk in. I count over 8 people at the registers and not only that, there seems to be some sort of crowd forming inside. As my anxiety gets the best of me, I shake my head. I move out of the entryway and stand at the side.
Closing my eyes, I do a coping mechanism that Tucker says to do, since it’s part of what I do. I step side to side, humming a random song that I don’t realize is Journey’s Don’t Stop Believin’, a song that I’ve been singing ever since I was five. It’s my late grandmother’s favorite song. My eyes pop open as I sing it through my teeth while tears fall down my face from the trembling in my body. There are too many people in there, too many things that could happen. Like someone walking up to speak to me.
I feel a presence behind me, but when I turn to face the person, it’s Tucker. He’s smiling at me and I don’t know how I still harbor a crush on my doctor. Not only is he that, but he’s married. I never wish to discuss the crush or anything. I know it’ll go away. He’s just one of the few people I can be in proximity with. It doesn’t help that he’s easy on the eyes of his tanned skin courtesy of his Costa-Rican mother and he has that Russian I could be a model from his father. His wavy black hair is always coiffed out of his face, and he has a killer smile. Both figuratively and literally.
“Everest, you okay?” He asks softly.
“Mm-hmm,” I wipe my tears. “I, I…”
“Take your time and a deep breath. Don’t rush to tell me I’m here.” Tucker reassures me.
“Uh, I, I couldn’t stay in the car too long. I was getting restless and Tucker?”
“Yes, Everest?”
“I think I need to go back and get Coco. I can’t do this without her. I’m not ready to do this without her.” I confess.
Tucker smiles. “I thought you would say something like that,” he signals one of his men and they walk off towards the other SUV.
I’m aware of what Tucker is, or rather, who he is. As long as he protects me, I don’t care. I trust him with all my heart and he’s got my loyalty. “Are you going to up the dosage for my meds?” I ask.
Tucker shakes his head. “No, I won’t.”
“Why not?” I ask.
“Because Everest, it’ll impede you from performing.”
My eyes widen. “Did I get the role? Did they tell you?” My voice rises an octave. Tucker sent my audition out for the role of an extra singer in the background of Moulin Rouge here at the Glenn Royal Theatre this morning, and they already have an answer for him.
“Yes, they did, but Everest, you didn’t get that role of a background singer.” He says.
My excitement drops like a ton of bricks. “Oh? Okay. That’s something expected, right? I should know that a no is possible, right? Even if I tried my best?”
“Yes, but they want you to play the role of Satine. They said they love your voice, and they watched your other tapes.” Tucker’s big smile makes me smile even wider.
All I can think of is singing the one song that my grandmother loved so much, Come what May. Not only that, but how I’ll have to rehearse, making sure my voice doesn’t crack. My happiness is there one moment and then it’s gone because she won’t be there to see it.
“It’s okay for you to be happy at this moment with her, Everest. She may not be here physically, but she’s with you. You’re part of her.” Tucker says.
I nod, and before I close my eyes, one of Tucker’s men brings me Coco. I drop to my knees and hug my emotional support Labrador. I didn’t want to leave her, and I’m so glad Tucker brought her with him. Suddenly, all the anxiousness and nervousness calm down a bit more. “Thank you, Tucker. For everything.”
“Anytime. Now, stay here. I’ll be back.”
Hugging Coco, I sing the other song that I love from the Moulin Rouge soundtrack, the Elephant Love Medley.
“She has an animal, huh?” I hear the session interrupter’s voice.
My eyes fly open and connect with his striking ones. We do the same thing we first did in the car. We stare at each other. I break away first and stand up, taking Coco with me towards the car without answering him. He’s easy on the eyes, yes, but he looks too long and he stares as if he’s trying to read me. I don’t like it. I don’t like him. Even though he doesn’t remember who he is, it doesn’t mean I need to get near him. When I look back, he’s with another him. This one has shorter hair. It clicks with the way he interrupted my session plus the billboard. This is the infamous Whit? Whit and Walt? Sounds like twins. When both look my way, a squeak leaves my lips without my permission and I quickly climb into the car.
