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I describe the cascade of disjointed thoughts, Juliane’s residual energy causing me to pace restlessly. “It’s more than I heard from any other victims, but it makes less sense. I think it points to Oudin, though.”
I can tell by his reaction that Simon disagrees. He avoids my eyes and scratches his cheek, where fine fuzz from not shaving has developed. “Cat, while you were gone, I spent some time thinking about Mother Agnes, Magister Thomas, and the Sanctum, trying to connect them to the earlier victims. And there’s one thing Altum Ferris insisted was critical to remember: What the killerneedswill never change. The way he tries to get it may.”
Different methods, same madness.
“So what does he need?” I ask as I reach the doorway to the washroom.
He watches me pivot around again. “I’m sure the answer is in what the killer did to their bodies.”
I stop and frown at him. “He was disgusted. They weren’t worthy to even look at him.”
“Exactly.” Simon nods. “He feels very superior.”
I resume pacing. “Which sounds exactly like Oudin.”
Simon looks doubtful. “Oudin plays in the gutters, and he knows it. He has no illusions about himself.”
“Fine.” I don’t want to argue. “Why did the killer switch to Sisters of Light and Sanctum workers and framing the master architect and you?”
“Because there is one thing all of them have in common.” Simon waits for me to stop and meet his eyes. “You.”
“Me?”
Simon holds his hand up to keep me from objecting further. “That doesn’t mean you were the target. Before I left, he taunted me with that note, indicating this was now a game for him and he would defeat me. After Nichole, he must have realized the most effective way to hurt me was through you.” Simon pauses and swallows. “He not only took away your family and your life’s work, he managed to turn me against you.”
“And then he came for me,” I whisper.
“Yes.” Simon shudders.
Why hadn’t the killer finished the job then? Maybe he thought I was as good as dead. And he needed to deliver the masterstroke against his enemy: Juliane’s murder and the blame for it.
I still feel like a critical piece is missing. “I’m with you, Simon, but you have to agree that all means it can’t be Lambert. He loved Juliane more than anyone.”
Simon slumps in his chair, his eyes dropping to the floor. “And I have a hard time believing he would hurt you, too. I just…” He stops and sighs. “You’re right.”
Something about his acceptance is off. “What would Altum Ferris say?”
“He would say to trust my instincts,” Simon says to his hands.
“Then why aren’t you doing that?”
“I am,” he mumbles. “They’re telling me Lambert has feelings for you. That’s what’s clouding my judgment.”
I stare at him. “Are you saying you’rejealous?”
Simon lifts his head, but only halfway. “I’m saying compared to him, I have nothing to offer.”
I kneel to put my face level with his. “I don’t care about that.”
“But I do,” Simon whispers. “Enough to step aside for someone who could take care of you as I could not.”
I lean closer. “That’s my choice, remember?”
Simon lifts his mouth just out of reach of mine, his eyes full of anguish. “It’s also mine, Cat.”
