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“I haven’t . . . not since Blake.”
“Then why do you have so much trouble admitting that you love me—because of him?”
“Maybe a little,” she conceded, turning again and busying herself with the meal.
“You can trust me, y’know,” he whispered, kissing the back of her neck gently. “I won’t hurt you.”
Please don’t, she thought but said nothing as she slipped the fried eggs, ham and hash browns onto a platter. Chase let go of her and was seated at the table by the time she’d finished buttering the toast and had placed silverware, plates and jam on the red-and-white checkered cloth.
“Looks great,” he mumbled.
“Especially when you’re starved,” she teased.
He took a bite and winked at her. “Especially when you’re on the other side of the table.”
“Don’t—”
“Don’t what?” His amused eyes sparkled a crystal blue as he continued eating and watching her.
“Don’t be charming. Okay? I just can?
??t handle it this morning.”
“Why not?”
She spread raspberry jam on her toast and avoided his gaze. “You wouldn’t understand.”
“Try me.”
After several seconds of trying to eat breakfast and avoiding the subject, she pushed her plate aside in disgust. “It’s just that I’ve got too much to think about right now. Cody’s trying to grow up too fast, he’s waiting on pins and needles for a father who won’t show up, the farm’s barely surviving, half the equipment is broken down, Caleb’s trying everything he can to convince me to sell and—”
“And some guy you barely know who works with your worst enemy has just asked you to marry him.”
“Yes! Yes!” she said, nodding. “It’s just too much right now. Understand?”
“Nope. You were right. I don’t understand. Because you could make your life so much simpler if you just learned to trust a little.”
She glared at him across the table, picked up her plate and carried it to the sink. “So you have all the answers, don’t you?”
“Not all of them,” he admitted, finishing breakfast and bringing his plate to her.
“Name one question you don’t have an answer for,” she baited.
He poured himself another cup of coffee and lounged against the doorframe as he thought. “I don’t know what happened to your cattle last year. Didn’t you say something about them getting sick?”
“My cattle?” She looked up sharply and then shrugged. “It was a mix-up, I guess. They got into some old pesticide we had around here. A couple died. Two cows and a calf had to be killed, but the rest survived.”
“A pesticide?” Chase’s countenance grew hard.
“No, that’s wrong. It was really a herbicide—an old can of dioxin got spilled in the barn, though it beats me how it happened. I didn’t even know we still had any of the stuff around.”
“You said you blamed Caleb.”
“I said I’d like to blame him.”
“But you can’t?”
“I didn’t catch him snooping around my barn, if that’s what you mean. He’s been careful to stay on his side of the fence—until you came along.”
