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She sighed. “And that is what you must not do.”
“Livia,” he said. “I appreciate that it means something to you.”
“Okay,” she said. “That’s very good. So when you find yourself drifting off, perhaps you can find it in you to appreciate that.”
And for the next hour, he did endeavor to listen. And when he found it difficult, he focused on what it meant to her.
“So much better,” she said. “Now tell me about something you like.”
“Archery?”
She laughed. “Archery. All right. Why do you like it?”
“I like the thrill of the sound of the arrow flying through the air, knowing it will land at the center of its target. Knowing that I never fail. There is something intoxicating about seeing that. Seeing it and knowing it is so.”
“Arrogant, but human.”
“I am not a human, though, I am a king.”
“It isn’t about what you think. It’s about what people will think.”
“Why do you feel this so strongly?”
“Because I know what it’s like, to be vulnerable. To be on the street. The idea that somebody strong is in charge, someone who might actually care for you, who has the heart of someone who would pull a girl from the street, and give her a new life... Oh, knowing that would have given me something to hope for. You don’t think it matters—emotion, connection—but it does. Even if you cannot feel it, if you could show it, that would make all the difference in the world to the people who struggle.”
“You are not wrong.”
“Is that your way of saying I’m right?”
“I wouldn’t go that far.”
“Well, however far you would go... I’m glad that we could come to an agreement.”
“I’m going to need you to come with me to this event. In fact, I believe you should come to all of them. Monitor my performance. Tell me how I’m doing.”
“You want me to give you notes?”
“Yes,” he said, “I believe I do. I think I would find it beneficial.”
“Well...if you would find it beneficial...then...all right.”
“Make sure you wear black, you will match the rest of the staff.”
Those parting words echoed in Matteo’s mind. He had truly said that to her. That she made sure she blended in. The problem with Livia was that, in his opinion, she didn’t blend in easily. She was a distinct-looking woman, and she had been staff. So, it had been fair enough. Right now, she was not blending at all. She was eating bread and butter and the absolute joy in her expression was impossible to downplay.
“You are not so unhappy with me now,” he said.
“Well, it’s impossible to be unhappy when you’re eating bread and butter.”
“Is it?”
“Remember when you told me that I could make use of the pantry whenever I wanted?”
“Yes,” he said. For he remembered every detail about that night. About their first real conversation. When he had been naked and drinking coffee, and she had perched herself on the end of the bed.
“It was a revelation. To be able to have food whenever I wanted. My life was never like that. Growing up, I...” She hesitated.
“Tell me,” he said. For he didn’t know anything about how she had grown up. He knew about her time on the streets, but not how she came to be there. Not even really how long she had been there. They had spoken of that part of her life, but not the time before it, and he’d always had the sense that it was the before that was all too painful for her to cope with.
