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“Omg.” She leans into my back; her tiny self doesn’t come up to my neck. Her small arms barely fit around me but having her dependent on me for her safety is feeding the control inside of me.

With the wind in our faces wheezing past and her arms anchored around me in trust and for safety, I feel free. Like a whole person for the first time and it is a feeling I know I can become addicted to.

We drive for half an hour, no words, no fears. Just us and the open road. This is how it should always be.

CHAPTER 14

Oh my gosh. I can't believe I am doing this. I ditched school, rode on the back of a motorcycle and am in another town with a boy. So not a god fearing woman. “What do you want to do first?” He asks, wrapping his arms around my waist, kissing my neck.

“I have no idea.” I tell him, more focused on the feeling of his lips against my skin.

“There seems to be a carnival happening in a parking lot. Would you like to go?”

“I have never been to one.” I honestly feel like a freak. My father believed that anything that was not related to church was a gateway to sin.

“Well then baby, let’s go.” He grabs my hand and we walk into what I feel is another world. There are people everywhere, some of them young couples, older couples and people with their young children. I find myself spinning as I take in the colors and lights. “Why don’t we start off with the staple of every Carnival.” He pulls me toward a man holding a rack of pink and blue packages.

“I have always wanted to try cotton candy.”

“Well I am happy to be with you when you do.” He gives the man money and I pick out the pink one. Like a little kid on her birthday, I pull a piece off and shove it in my mouth. Holy cow. The burst of pure sugar and syrup that dissolves on my tongue cannot be anything but evil. It is the single most delicious thing I have had in my life. No wonder kids go crazy when they have sugar. My blood is flowing like a roaring rapid now. “Is it good?” He asks, watching me closely like he thinks I am going to go off the deep end.

“Alex, it is amazing. My mouth is tingling from the sugar.” I tell him giggling at the feeling.

“Now you know what your pussy tastes like, baby.” Oh my. I stop licking the sugar off my fingers when his words send zings of need to my button. “Here, let me.” He pulls my fingers into his mouth and continues what I was doing. Slowly he slides them in and out one by one, making sure his tongue moves between each digit. Oh man. I think I just gushed in my underwear.

“Alex.” I say his name hoping he can read me and I know he does. Instead of taking me somewhere so he can cool this fire he just built, he drops my hands, kisses me and pulls me with him.

“Let’s go do some rides.” We end up spending an hour between the Whirly Wheel, Ferris Wheel and the Teacup ride waiting in line. After which we eat Corn on the cob, fried dough which is a revelation in itself topped with ice cream.

My stomach has not eaten so much in my life. “Did you have fun, baby?” he asks as we walk back to the bike.

“So much fun, Alex. Thank you so much. I am stuffed though.” I tell him giggling more than I have in eighteen years. I pat my stomach and imitate a big belly. His eyes darken suddenly and I start to shiver. I don’t know what happened in the last few seconds, but something did.

I am going to ask what is wrong when his eyes lighten up again and he mumbles under his breath. “Not stuffed yet.” What does he mean? More food? “I am happy you enjoyed yourself baby, but the day is not over yet.”

“What could possibly be better than this?” My cheeks hurt from smiling so much, but when I am with him, it is all I want to do. He stops strapping the helmet on me and his always strong, pensive features soften and he stares at me. I would normally fidget under such scrutiny, but I don't feel lacking when he looks not just at me, but inside of me.

“I want to be the one to put that look on your face, forever, Pequeña.” I have to be blushing because my face feels hot. I don’t stop and think. I simply lean over and touch my mouth to his. It is the first time I have done it first and it feels right. Well damn. It's about time. Welcome to the real world church girl. Oh boy.

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