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“I don’t want to talk to him or see him,” I said, my stomach churning. I may have learned to be strong and how to hold my head high, but even the mention of my father’s name made all that I had built up come crumbling down again.
“I was going to recommend that you do not. You have grown into a strong, beautiful woman these last few months.” I smiled softly as if he had been reading the thoughts in my head. “I would hate to see that change.”
I swallowed, twisting my tongue in an attempt to find the right words. “Is… is he ever going to get out?”
His face hardened. “Are you sure you’re ready for that answer?”
Sitting a little straighter I nodded. “Please… I need to know. I’ve spent so long wondering who my dad was. Knowing that he’s such a dark and angry human being makes me question who I am. I am his blood. I am part of him—”
“You are my blood. I will not let you go on thinking that just because he’s your father that you’re poisoned with his problems.” His voice was stern and he stared me directly in the eyes. It was intimidating but at the same time, I dared not look away. “Our family is strong, we are resilient and we are humble. Never let yourself think anything else.”
A shudder went through my body. His words were full of passion.
“Marco will no longer taint this family with his presence.”
I took a few moments to process that. Of course, he would never come straight out and say what was going to happen to him. My uncle was too smart to voice those words, not knowing who could be listening, but what he had done was calm me.
Marco, had almost killed the one person who I could call a friend and had scarred me for life. I stared down at my hand which still bore the marks of his unorthodox punishment. The burn had discolored my palm and left it with a strange texture. A permanent reminder of the pain I endured, and my stupidity because I was so desperate to be a part of something more.
I nodded, accepting his explanation. It felt strange to be so numb to something that any normal person would find shocking. I thought hearing those words would hurt more, that I would feel some kind of ache in my chest like I did when I lost my mom. Maybe I fit in here more than I thought? Or maybe I just didn’t care? Maybe I just wanted him to hurt?
Those thoughts alone stirred my stomach.
“I have to go back to Athens to pick up my diploma,” I stated, changing the direction of the conversation before I started to demand details.
Uncle Anthony tilted his head to the side. “Are you concerned about this?”
My hands squeezed the arms of the chair. “Not so much concerned, but… it’s them.” I fought against the tears as they beat against the dam. I wouldn’t let them through.
My uncle took a deep breath but nodded his head. “Never feel like you’re beneath someone because you have made mistakes, amore.” I saw the strong cover fall from his face and for the first time since I had been there, I felt more from him than just a need to protect his family name, I felt an uncle who was sharing his heart with his niece.
My body warmed.
I wanted so badly to feel like I fit in here. I had tried, but I’d been raised so differently and I continued to feel like an outcast.
I wanted that large family who were kind and caring and spent time together. I wanted big family Christmases and vacations. I wanted uncles who got too drunk and told hilarious stories during family gatherings and grandparents who bought you socks for every birthday. I wanted a family who gossiped and gloated. I wanted all the weird stuff that each family does that for them is normal.
This was not the DePalma family.
The DePalma’s were strong but in a different kind of way. Their family ties were unbreakable but for different reasons. Loyalty to the family name was bred into them, everything was set in stone and there were certain expectations for every member. I bet Celia never complained to her friends about how overbearing her father was, and I bet Rico would have never dreamt of sneaking out at night to go to some high school party. Simply because they had too much to lose. The DePalma family name was not something that you dared risk.
That was just too much pressure and I could already feel it suffocating me.
“Would you like me to send someone with you?” Uncle Anthony’s question made me sit a little taller.
I shook my head. “No. No, I need to do this by myself.”
He frowned. “There’s no shame in asking for help, Rosalie. We are family.”
Forcing a smile, I shook my head. “Thank you, Uncle. But I’ll never stand on my own two feet if I continue to hide behind you.”
Smiling, he patted my leg and stood. “You are wise.”
This was the good thing about my uncle, he may raise his children a certain way, but he definitely did not raise them to be cowards and back down. This was something I was learning fast, something I needed.
I took a deep breath as he excused himself and exited his office. The thought of going back to Athens scared the shit out of me. I would like to think that I could dart in and out without being noticed, but I knew better than that. That area was owned by the Brothers by Blood MC and there was no way I was going to fly under their radar.
Having one of Uncle Anthony’s men with me would be comforting, but I would be hiding my head in the sand.
I needed to face my demons and deal with the consequences of my actions.
Maybe this trip would help ease my mind?
Maybe I would go back and find everything was all good and that nobody even cared about what had happened?
Maybe I was just dreaming?
