AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I hit Mom’s house first, and she’d almost leaped out of her skin when I appeared in the kitchen while she was cutting up vegetables for dinner.
Denver acted like he didn’t care, but he still gave me a hug which he hadn’t done since he was little.
Macy was there, too, and man could that kid scream.
I spent the night at home. Telling my mom all about college, about the papers I was taking and the friends I’d made—even though I’d already told her most of it on the phone. Leaving out the part about the club I was working in being more strip club than the restaurant slash bar I’d told her it was.
The next morning, I was driving up to the clubhouse in Mom’s car after offering to drop Macy off for her, so I could see Uncle Leo and Hadley and have cuddles with Creed.
My stomach twisted into knots as I pulled up at the gates, and Levi stepped up to the driver’s door with a confused look on his face. “Hey, Meyah, wasn’t expecting to see you until next weekend.”
I shrugged. “Had to shuffle a few things around. Couldn’t get away next weekend and wanted to see everyone.” His head bobbed up and down. “Uncle Leo home?”
“Yeah, girl, head in. I’m sure everyone’s going to be surprised.” The tone of his voice seemed a little off, like he wasn’t sure about what the reaction would be to my homecoming.
Maybe it was a mistake.
What if I walked in there and Ham was there?
What if he’d already moved on?
The hurt I’d felt when I’d walked in on him and Jess was going to be nothing compared to what I was going to feel if I had to see him with someone else. My heart leaped up into my throat, and suddenly I thought maybe this wasn’t a good idea. Perhaps I wasn’t ready to see him again. I fucking loved him. I was meant to be his old lady. I was meant to be standing at his side supporting him and doing all those things that the other old ladies had talked about.
Loving him when things weren’t perfect.
Loving him when I knew he was out doing bad things.
Loving him when I knew it could get me killed.
I was ready to do that.
To fucking throw it all in, and just let whatever be will be. I was ready to live in the moment and be thankful for the time we had, knowing it could end at any moment.
At least, I thought I was.
I’d convinced myself I was.
But then it was all over.
A door opened, and I took the first exit and ran.
Everything I’d prepared myself for, everything I’d imagined for the past year, it was all gone and I was left hurt, confused, and without my rock to keep me grounded.
I heard a click, but I didn’t move. My door was open, I knew Uncle Leo was standing there. Tears burned at my eyes as I leaned back in the seat, my hands in my lap, trying to keep some kind of control over my emotions. In reality, I wanted to throw the car into reverse and just get the hell out of there.
“I need to go.” My voice was barely a whisper, I didn’t even recognize it, and it was nowhere near as strong as I’d imagined it in my head. Confidence was apparently out the window, and everything I’d imagined myself doing or saying was all a joke.
“You need to get out of the car,” Uncle Leo ordered, reaching in and switching off the ignition before pulling the keys out and tucking them into his back pocket.
My heart hurt. It was hard to breathe.
I’d done okay up until now.
I cut the ties and walked away.
I tried to make myself a different person. A person who could stand on her own two feet and be independent.
But there was still part of me who was that same girl who ran out of the clubhouse that day, thinking the guy who had slowly tightened his hand around my heart, capturing it as his, would hold it close and protect it. But instead, he’d ripped it from my chest and tossed it away like a regular piece of trash.
