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It was Charlie. Thiswasn’ta good time. In fact, it was the worst time possible.
‘Hi, Ch-Charlie,’ I said, trying to compose myself and not let on that I’d been crying my eyes out for hours.
‘Sophia? Are you okay?’ he said. ‘Are you—are youcrying?’
I couldn’t help it, I just lost it and started bawling like a five-year-old who’d just been told there’d be no presents or birthday cake at her party.
‘Oh my goodness, Sophia,’ he said, sounding flustered and unsure how to respond. ‘I didn’t mean to upset you.’
‘It’s not—it’s not you Charlie. S-sorry,’ I said, trying and failing to pull myself together. ‘He’s left me, Charlie. He’s gone?’
‘Who’s left you, Sophia?’ asked Charlie. ‘Where are you? Are you at home?’
‘N-no!’ I stuttered. ‘I’m at his place and he’s gone. He’s left us.’
‘What’s the address?’ he demanded. ‘I’m coming to get you right now!’
Somehow, Charlie had managed to decipher the garbled address I’d given him in between my embarrassing meltdown, as, in what couldn’t have been more than forty-five minutes, he was ringing the buzzer, then running up the stairs.
The door was still ajar from when I’d first entered hours ago. He bundled in, saw me on the bed and threw his arms around me. I leant on his shoulder and continued sobbing.
‘Whatisthis godawful place?’ he said, scanning the room in disgust. ‘What are you doing here, Sophia? Who lives in this hovel?’
Shit. I wasn’t even thinking. Charlie had just come to ‘rescue’ me at Lorenzo’s place. Lorenzo. The man I had fallen in love with. I shouldn’t have let Charlie come here. I should have said I was okay. So stupid! How an earth was I going to explain this?
I sat up straight, then, as gently as I could, gave Charlie a top-line summary of everything that had happened.
I explained that I’d met Lorenzo in Italy, that he’d come to London and I’d agreed to see him, but only when I was on a break from Charlie and I insisted that I didn’t mean to hurt him.
When I broke the pregnancy news and asked Charlie about whether he’d taken the condom off early, he simply shrugged his shoulders and mumbled that he ‘couldn’t remember’. Given the bombshell I’d just dropped, I didn’t feel that I was in a position right now to push him on this. I could see his cheeks burning with anger and that he was ready to vent.
‘So let me get this straight,’ said Charlie, grinding his jaw. ‘That Sunday, you told me you needed some time away from me, to be alone to consider the future of our relationship and then, literally days—no, in fact, mere hours later, you jumped into bed with another man?’ Charlie began pacing up and down the flat.
‘I know how it sounds,’ I replied ‘but—’
‘And now you’re pregnant, and the babymightbe mine, but then again itmightbe that chef’s, and now that he knows you’re knocked up, he’s dumped you and left the country?’ he snapped.
‘Well…no…well, yes…it’s true that I can’t be sure who the father is, and yes, it does seem like he’s left, but it doesn’t make sense that he’s gone when…’ I stopped myself mid-sentence. Charlie didn’t want to hear my thoughts on Lorenzo and the fact that whilst before, I would have thought it was typical for him to leave, now that I knew him, it was out of character because I truly believed Lorenzo was a good man.
I reconsidered my words. ‘Charlie…I don’t know what to say. Other than that I’m so sorry,’ I added, wiping the tears that were now streaming down my cheeks with my sleeve.
He continued pacing up and down the room, scowling as if he’d just been offered a cockroach sandwich.
‘Would you excuse me a moment, Charlie?’ I said as I crept past him. Not an ideal time to break the conversation, but I’d been bursting for the loo for hours, which couldn’t be good for my bladder. ‘I just need to go to the bathroom.’
I shut the door behind me and glared at myself in the mirror. Puffy, red eyes, smudged mascara and eyeliner, messy hair. My outward appearance was definitely a reflection of the turmoil that was going on inside my brain.
I splashed some cold water on my face and tried to straighten myself up a little. I then sat on the lid of the toilet seat whilst I tried to gather my thoughts.
As tempting as it was to hide away in here and not have to deal with everything, I needed to face Charlie and whatever angry insults he wanted to throw at me.
I took a deep breath and unlocked the bathroom door. Charlie was standing by the coffee table, pushing something into his pocket. Couldn’t see what. Couldn’t see much of anything, really, as although I’d temporarily stopped the waterworks, my eyes were still a little blurry.
‘Sorry I took so long,’ I said. I then began to frown. Charlie was acting weird. It wasn’t his anger. That was surely still there. It would take longer than the ten minutes I’d spent in the bathroom for him to calm down. He was fidgeting. Flustered. Strange.
‘I have to go,’ he snapped. ‘I…I need to get out of here.’ He quickly shuffled towards the door.
‘I understand,’ I said. ‘I know this must have all come as a massive shock…once again I’m sorry,’ I added, but before I could even finish my sentence, he was gone.
I plonked myself down on the bed and reached for my phone to order a taxi home. The longer I stayed here, in the place which held so many memories of my time with Lorenzo, the worse I would feel.
I stood up, gathered up my things, then surveyed the bedroom, kitchen and living room areas to check I had everything. Something was different, but I didn’t know what. I still wasn’t even thinking straight. How could I? Lorenzo had left me. Charlie hated me and my friends were barely speaking to me.
My whole world was spinning out of control and this time, I had no idea how to fix it.
