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‘Oh God, Lorenzo. That’s terrible,’ I said. Jesus. This man hadn’t been joking when he’d said he’d had a tough life.
‘I was devastated. I started drinking. I did not go to work. I lost my job. For six months I was a mess.’ He paused again as he held his head down—like he was reliving the pain and the shame. ‘I slept with lots of women and said I would never trust or stay with one woman again—that way, I cannot get hurt. That is why I got that reputation. But I did not enjoy it. After a while it is boring. It leaves you empty. All I really wanted was a wife and a family and to be loved. It took years before I was strong again. I got a job with Taste and things were better. I tried to trust again. Then I had problems with the crazy woman. So when you told me you were pregnant and you cannot be sure if it is mine or Charlie’s, it brought back the pain and memories of Stefano, and I did not know how to deal with that.’
‘I’m so sorry, Lorenzo. I didn’t realise,’ I said, wrapping my arms around him.
‘Also, when I told you I had important things to take care of when I went back to Italy in January, I had more problems with my ex that I tried to fix, and I did not want to worry you,’ he explained. ‘I thought it was finished, but then it got worse again, so that is why I had to come back to Italy quickly. You see. My life is complicated. I do not know if it is good for a good woman like you to be with a man like me,’ he said, bowing his head again.
He wasn’t wrong about the shit he had gone through. And there I was adding to it by telling him about the pregnancy, not considering how it might affect him. Despite all of his issues, it still didn’t put me off.
‘But, Lorenzo, those experiences are in the past. They’re behind you now. I’m not perfect, but compared to the women you’ve been with before, I’m a bloody angel. You won’t experience that pain and turmoil with me. And I won’t allow anyone to take our baby away from you.’
‘You have reason, Sophia. I know you are a good woman. That’s why I came back. I love you,’ he said as he leant forward and kissed me softly on the lips. ‘The time we spent here in London, I have never been so happy. It is not just the sex, which was amazing. We have a connection. We laughed, I felt calm—like I was complete. Especially now with the baby. And I know this baby is mine, Sophia. Ifeelit. So I say, no:Fuck Charlie!I am going to show Sophia that I am a man and I am ready to be a good father.’
He reached in his pocket for his phone and unlocked the screen.
‘What’s up?’ I asked, wondering if he had taken it out to call someone.
‘While I was away, I started working again with Taste, as it is the new season, and did many extra shifts at a restaurant in town, so I saved up money for us. But on my day off, I worked at my house.’ He showed me his phone and started scrolling through photos of a room. In the first pictures, it looked quite messy and disorganised, with a guitar in the corner, a bed in the centre, posters of some rock band I didn’t recognise on the flaky walls and bags of clothes everywhere.
In the photos that followed, it showed the room had been cleared out, then the walls had been painted lemon, a new carpet laid and…
Oh my goodness. There was a cot in place of the bed with a cute mobile attached and a little rocking horse and playpen in the corner. Adorable!
‘You see?’ he said, looking up from the phone and straight at me. ‘I cleared out my brother’s room and made it into a nursery. For our baby. And I decorated my bedroom too. Before, it looked like a man’s room. Now I made it nice for a woman too—for you.’
OMG. All this time he’d been away, not only had he been thinking of me, ofus, he had been working hard trying to build a life for us too.
‘Sophia, I know it is a big decision, but I want spend my life with you.’ He put his phone back in his pocket and then took my hands into his. ‘I know you have life in London and family and successful business too. But when we talked, I felt like you want a change, no? You are ready maybe for a different type of life. More time to enjoy and less time spent at work? And you said you love me too. So I wondered if you want to come and live with me? In Italy? We can be a family, together.’
What?I couldn’t believe it. I tried to compose myself.
‘Wow, Lorenzo,’ I said, picking my jaw up from the floor. ‘I don’t… I don’t actually know what to say.’
‘I could only get one day off from work, which was already difficult because it was a Saturday, so my flight leaves Gatwick tomorrow morning seven forty-five a.m.,’ he said. ‘I booked a ticket for you to come with me. Not for you to live there straight away. I know that will take many months of planning. But just for you to try. For a few weeks. See if you like it. What you think?’
‘I…I…’ I replied, still trying to take everything in.
‘I know it is a lot to think about, so I will leave you now,’ he said, standing up as he still kept hold of my hands. ‘If you want to try, meet me at the airport at six a.m. I will wait for you until six fifteen. If you decide you do not want to come, I will understand, but I hope you do.’
He leant over and kissed me on the head and then bent down to kiss my stomach.
‘I will go and say hello to your family and then will leave to let you discuss with them. Is better that way, no? Try and enjoy the rest of your party. I hope I see you tomorrow morning, beauty.’
And with that, he was gone.
It was crazy to think that I’d dreamt about this just days after meeting him. And I’d dismissed it because it was ludicrous to let my mind run away with such thoughts after knowing the man all of five minutes. But somehow thiswasn’tsome mad fantasy. It was actually real. This was beyond nuts.
I loved Lorenzo with all my heart, but it was such a big decision. Was I really ready to give up my life in London, my family, friends, my home and the business I’d worked so hard to build, in fact almosteverything, to be with him?
