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“And yet it makes sense. You don’t remember vacations with your father after that. And you remember being at odds with your mother since you were young.”
She said softly, almost in wonder, “She ruined my life.”
Carter wrapped her tight. “Maybe your father ruined your life.”
“He’s not my father,” she said. “I don’t have a father.”
Donald Walker had never loved her. He’d only ever made her feel unwanted and unloved.
“He should have divorced your mother and let you both go.”
“She should’ve divorced him.” She wasn’t about to give her mother the benefit of the doubt.
He cupped her cheek, tipped her chin to make her look at him. “Maybe she was between a rock and a hard place. She might have been afraid your father would take you both away from her. Maybe he even threatened to.”
“Don’t defend her,” she hissed.
Staring into his eyes, she put her hand behind his head, pulling him close and kissing him defiantly. It wasn’t the sweet, longing kiss of the afternoon. It was savage, their lips smashing, their teeth knocking. Then he opened his mouth, and she devoured him.
She didn’t want to talk about her mother. She didn’t want to think about her father. She didn’t want to know if Xandros Daskalakis had a fling with her mother and got her pregnant. She wanted to blot out the last thirty years, the job she hated, the new firm where she faced rejection yet again.
Backing off, she muttered against his lips, “I won’t fail.”
Then she put her mouth on his and took command, diving into him, climbing on top of him, straddling him. She knew he wanted it. She could feel him between her legs, hard and hot. Bending down, she sucked his nipple, biting lightly until he gasped in need rather than pain. She slipped a hand inside his board shorts. Only to stop.
He was so beautiful, so full, so thick, and her mouth watered. She’d never enjoyed putting her mouth on a guy. That had always been for them; they begged, and you were supposed to give in. But now she felt the pleasure of it, hearing him groan, knowing how good she could make him feel. Wrapping her fist around him, she took him in her mouth, first the tip, then his whole crown, and finally she gave him everything. He groaned, then a growl rose from his belly, and he arched into her, quaking beneath her. She used her body to hold him on the bed. She took him the way a man took a woman, the one on top and in control and loving it.
She wasn’t graceful as she slipped out of her bikini panties without letting him escape her mouth.
And when he said, his hands in her hair, “Wait, wait, I want to come inside you,” she reared up, sat astride him, and buried him deep inside her,
“We don’t have a condom,” he hissed on an intake of breath.
It was too late. She didn’t care. “I’m on the pill, and I haven’t had sex since my last checkup. So I’m clean. What about you?”
“Me too,” he said in a strangled voice as she tightened her muscles around him
“Then we’re good,” she whispered.
She took him then. Until there was nothing left but sensation. Nothing but oblivion.
And finally, there was bliss.
* * *
She wasn’t asleepas Carter held her, his fingers gently caressing her arm.
“Feel better?”
She shook her head. “Not really.”
“It was still awesome.” He kissed the top of her head. “But it wasn’t how I wanted our first time to be.”
“How did you want it to be?”
He rolled her slightly until they were face to face, and he cupped her cheeks in his palms. “Like this.”
His kiss was gentle, sweet, and she opened to him. He delved deep, going slow. Then, still cupping her face in his hands, he kissed her ear, her cheek, the corner of her mouth, her chin, her throat. He dropped to her breasts, plumping her in his hand as he sucked the bead into his mouth. And everything inside her tightened.
