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Chapter7
Istood in the courtyard of St. James Church beneath the shade of overarching branches, the leaves now beginning to turn green after a winter stripped the tree clean. The new life above my head was bright and fresh, and I hoped it was indicative of the marriage I was about to seal myself into—clean and full of potential.
Mama spoke to Mrs. Hutton not far away, and Papa waited patiently at her side. It had been four weeks since the Pickering ball when our engagement was announced, and nearly four weeks since I had seen James.
He had sent around a note the following morning that he felt it best to return to Chelton straight away to prepare the house for my arrival. It was written between his finely penned lines that he also had some business up north which required his personal attention, and I could not help but wonder if that business was another woman. Was there a young lady in his parish who needed to be let down carefully in a way that only he could accomplish? Was his family not going to openly accept me into their home the way I wished?
Something had occurred after the Pickering ball to give James reason to believe he needed to make a week-long trip across the country prior to marrying me.
And the more frightening prospect—had he brought his brothers with him to London for the wedding?
Each new arrival in the small churchyard caused my nerves to heighten, though so far none of them were James. We’d chosen this particular church because it was where my parents were married more than two decades before, and they liked the sentimentality of carrying on the tradition, but each new arrival was dressed more finely than I, and I wondered at the purpose of such a fashionable venue for my wedding when I was not quite fashionable myself.
Each guest was either a friend of my parents or my groom, and I would do well to remember that. This wedding was for the benefit of my parents and the good of our reputation. It was not for me.
“Perhaps we ought to wait indoors,” Papa said.
I ran my hands down the pale blue silk of my gown and straightened the lace overlay. “You’ve spoken to the vicar already?”
“Yes.” He looked out over the stone-covered churchyard. “You’re certain this is the date?”
I nodded, though Papa was beginning to worry me. “James chose it himself.”
Mrs. Hutton left to walk inside, Mama close behind her, and I drew in a concerned breath. If James jilted me, would I feel relieved or only disheartened? I did not know which I dreaded more: to see James’s brother on the morning of my wedding, or to not have a wedding at all.
Loud footsteps clipped down the walkway, and James appeared around the corner. He was dashing in his crisp, black coat and clean cravat, and once he located me beneath the tree, he crossed to me directly. My heart jumped when he smiled, and I did my best to temper my sudden, overwhelming relief. I was not to be jilted this morning.
I glanced over his shoulder, but no one accompanied him.
James delivered a handsome bow. “Good morning, Felicity. Mr. Thurston.”
“Your family has not chosen to join you?”
James glanced away. “I told them that they needn’t bother. It is a long journey from Chelton, and since we are leaving for Cumberland directly after the wedding breakfast, I did not think it necessary.”
My shoulders relaxed, and I was grateful not to have to face anything but my impending marriage this morning.
James swept an arm toward the red brick church. “Shall we?”
I set my white gloved hand over his bent elbow. “Please.”
We followed Papa inside, and I grew more anxious with each passing pew full of Mama’s fashionable friends. I had not employed a ladies’ maid, having no need of one, and my hair was simply done up, my toilette far from extravagant. I’d allowed Mama to select my gown, but she had selected a simple blue gown with an abundance of lace. It was stunning, but not extravagant.
Did James realize his mistake now? I was not the sort like Miss Norland who took great care to appear lovely. I would never be that sort of person. I did not mind being plain. It suited my need to remain out of the general spotlight. But for the first time, I wondered if my husband would be at all bothered by it.
James smiled to those he knew as we took our places, but his expression was far more contemplative than disappointed. He caught my eyes when the vicar stood before us, and I found a refuge within his gaze. My lungs filled smoothly, and my worries fled.
“Dearly beloved,” the vicar began. “We are gathered here together in the sight of God, and in the face of this company, to join together this man and this woman in holy matrimony.”
My heart sped as he continued, and despite my fears, I could not allow myself to believe I was making a mistake.
The vicar’s attention turned to James as he asked if he would take me as his wife to love, comfort, and honor me.
“I will,” James said, his eyes fastened on me.
The vicar asked if I would take James, and obey, serve, love, and honor him. I looked to James. “I will.”
His mouth tipped into a half-smile. This man, this near-stranger, had just pledged himself to me, and I, in turn, to him. We were bonded now in a way that I could never be with anyone else.
