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9
WEAPONS
The ship sucked me right into the wall of my room, and suddenly I was in another one of those freaky tunnels. The tunnel somehow kept me suspended in mid-air, so it’s not like I felt myself sliding along the inner walls, but it was still freaky, because the whole trip only lasted a few seconds, and the next thing I knew I was being helped upright by the invisible forces that had suspended me. The ship put me onto my feet, and once it could tell I was standing up and stable, it let go of me with its invisible grip, and then wall opened up.
I stepped forward, right into Airlock’s room.
The last time I’d seen the woman, she’d just had an orgasm that she’d said was a real flower compared to the pathetic shadows Emissary and I had experienced. I still kind of hated Airlock for that. Just a little bit. Anyway, the last time I saw her she’d been naked, but had put on the top of a vacuum suit to hide her tits, which Thuliak had slobbered all over. I got tingly thinking about that.
Now she was…Goddess,what was she wearing?
I grinned at her, because it took some serious courage to wear whatever in Eden’s name she had on.
It was the most cloth I’d ever seen on a woman. It was enough raw material to fully clothe three women, most of the mass of it was on the dress part itself. It was a long dress, and it was poofy. For all I knew, Airlock could have been hiding Thuliak inside of that dress, and I wouldn’t have known any better.
The top was somehow worse. It almost looked like Airlock had asked the ship to modify her anatomy, because there was no way her waist could possibly be so narrow. I’d seen her naked. It wasn’t that narrow, but now she looked like an hourglass, with big wide hips flaring out below, and big huge boobs spilling out above. For all the cloth the dress had, it did nothing to hide her boobs. I grinned at that common point between her outfit and mine.
Where my armor was fully functional and historically accurate, Airlock’s looked like a costume. Especially the hat. It had all kinds of wild decorations and ornamentation on it. The hat and all the junk on it probably added a quarter of a meter to her height too. It was a tall hat stacked with a lot of tall…stuff. Including a bird’s feather, which stood very vertical and very high.
“What the hell are you two wearing?”
I spun around and saw Emissary, who was laughing at both of us. She’d chosen some boring outfit. It wasn’t like anything from Eden, but it was tame compared to what we wore. She wore skirt a little tighter than you’d ever see on Eden, and itdidmake her butt and thighs very prominent, but if a Khetar had to choose between fucking me or Emissary based on our outfits, I was pretty sure he’d pick me over her.
“The ship told me that this is what most modern human women wear,” Emissary said, “I like all these little old-timey touches. It feels classy.” She touched some little metal button on her jacket, and smiled as she rubbed it.
Emissary looked up, just now noticing Airlock’s ridiculous hat. “Airlock, I can’t tell if you’re justwayclassier than me, or if…”
I scoffed. “Or if you’re just wearing a fruit bowl on your head.”
“You’re one to talk!” Airlock said, jabbing a finger right at my boobs. “What in Eve’s ribisthat, Weapons? I’ve never seen armor cover so little of a woman’s body. If someone hit you with a sword, it would cut your tits off!”
I considered telling her my theory of how the metal bracers were probably meant to guard against attacks, and how this armor let me survive longer in the desert compared to something that covered me all up, but I decided on a much simpler argument. “I look hot.” I put my hands on my hips. My hips didn’t look as wide as hers, but I wasn’t cheating either with whatever ridiculous thing she had on her waist underneath that dress. “The ship told me that it pulled this outfit from Earth’s history. This woman’s name was Xena, and she was a warrioranda princess. So the armor worked for her.”
“Women weren’t allowed to be warriors on Earth,” Emissary said, “the ship must be mistaken.”
I shook my head. “There was a video of it. I saw Xena taking on three men and winning. She even did a backflip over their heads, and she did this fierce battlecry too.”
“How was there a video?” Airlock asked. “I don’t think they had video back in…whatever time period that was.”
So the video had been a re-creation. I knew in my heart that Xena was real. What had the ship said? 95 or 98%? It was a high number.
I looked Airlock dead in the eyes. She had her Khetar, but I still needed to find mine. This outfit mademefeel like a warrior princess. That’s what mattered. “I’m wearing this, Airlock.”
Then I turned toward Emissary. “I want to look as hot as possible so I can get the strongest Khetar to pick me, but I don’t want to look like…like Airlock.”
Airlock cracked a smile, thenshovedme. “You bitch!”
She was just joking around with me, so I didn’t need to draw my sword or use my sharp disc weapon to cut the feather off her hat. I’d seen a video of Xena throwing the disc, having it cut down multiple men, then return straight to her hand. I did kind of doubt that part was historically accurate, but I bet I’d be able to hit Airlock’s dumb feather with it, even if it didn’t come back to me.
“Breakfast is ready,” the ship said.
A table full of food and drinks was standing in a spot where I was reasonably certain no table had stood just a minute ago.
We sat down, and I realized my skirt was so short that you could see my kitty unless I crossed my legs. Airlock was having quite a hard time of it too. Her big poofy dresses that could hold a big-dingdonged alien in it wasn’t very good at fitting beneath a table. She got it stuck under her chair legs a few times, but after some fussing and some help from Emissary, she got it all sorted out.
The food was good. It was all mostly stuff we had from Eden, but there were some strange and exciting surprises among the spread of dishes to try. My favorite were these very dry tasting pastries that were covered in some very rich and fatty tasting thing thatalmosttasted like butter, but was so much more rich and satisfying.
I was hungry, but I took my time, especially eating the different colored jams and jellies, because I didn’t want to slop crumbs and sticky stuff right down between my boobs.
