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Jamie blinked again, and in that moment he reminded me so much of Mom. Just staring, waiting to see if I’d crack under the pressure.
“Why are you up?” I asked him, quickly changing the subject.
“I need a drink,” he said simply, and then moved away from me, but like a deer in headlights, I stood frozen.
I held still as I heard him move into the kitchen, heard the cupboards open and shut, and heard the faucet flip on. He hadn’t seen. If he had, he would’ve said something. He would’ve held that information over me, nursed that blackmail material to the bitter end.
Jamie hadn’t seen Harry. Hadn’t seen me kiss him.
I just had to keep telling myself that.
When Jamie made his way back into the living room, he held a small glass of water in his hand. Before he passed me, he stopped. “Why are there two angels?”
“Uh, I—the first one looked terrible.”
Jamie glanced at the back door behind me. I waited for it. Waited for him to open his little mouth and say something. Would there be any talking myself out of it? Mom and Dad would surely believe him over me. They wouldn’t believe in the “innocent until proven guilty” mantra, not in this situation.
“Okay. Lock the back door, okay?” Without waiting for my response, he walked away, his footsteps near silent on the stairs.
I stood there, afraid to be relieved. Just like that?
A moment later, I could hear his bedroom door click closed. Just like that.
My mind moved at a whirlwind pace, unable to slow down. The adrenaline from almost being caught still trembled underneath my skin, and I knew sleep would be so distant in my future. I made my way up the staircase quietly, pressing my fingers to my mouth. I could almost pretend like my fingers were Harry’s lips, in a way that was so pathetic.
I checked the hallway window before I went to bed, and I had a clear view of our two jacked-up snow angels, Harry’s with the big butt and mine with the lopsided torso. Their arms were overlapping—two angels holding hands.
But then I noticed the two sets of footprints. Clearly two sets, since Harry’s feet were larger than mine. If Jamie had noticed both angels, had he really missed the footprints?
Even though the idea of Jamie seeing us, possibly telling Mom and Dad about it, made me feel sick to my stomach, the happiness from what had happened eclipsed that. At least for tonight. I kissed Harry asme. He knew me and he liked me. Liked me enough to leave Crushed Beanz and come over to talk. He knew me as Stella and Destelle and liked the two of us. Both sides of me.
It was enough to make me do a little happy dance.
When I woke the next morning and peeked outside, the angels were gone, blown over by the winter wind, a beautiful memory I would keep with me forever and ever.
