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The thing about rejection for a guy like me...
Is that it’s a bitter pill to swallow. I’ve lost count of how many times she’s rejected me, and I have to admit, it’s pissing me off more than it should.Leia Walton.Standing in the corner of my fraternity, talking to that prick. With his blond hair and blue polo shirt and khakis like this is a damn country club. Where did shefindthis guy? PrettyBoyChats.com? He looks like a high school boy. One of those perfect, scholarly, bring-home-to-Mom college boys. He makes me sick. What does he have that I don’t? A trust fund? There’s no way a guy like that could please a girl like her. And I wouldn’t be an ounce worried about him if she weren’t laughing at whatever lame joke he was telling her.
This whole thing is painful to watch, sitting on the couch in my living room. The music was loud as hell, and everyone was too busy with shenanigans in the kitchen. As I rub my eyes from this torture porn and drink my beer, Hunter slouches down next to me.
“Well, you look like shit.” Story of my life. Following my gaze, he lets out a chuckle that’s all too knowing. “Still crushing on fresh meat?”
“Rosen, can we not do this? I’m not in the mood to shoot the shit.”
“This is becoming embarrassing. She’s clearly not attracted to you.”
“Bullshit.”
“Bullshit all you want, she’s enjoying herself more and more with the golden boy each and every day.” We just sit there and stare at their interaction, and it looks lame as hell. What could he be saying that’s making her laugh that goddamn much? “Hey, you think he’s been inside her, dude?” That image makes my blood boil. The thought of him moving in and out of that body? Getting to hear those moans? I can only imagine what it would be like...yeah, that’s not a pleasant sight. Groaning, I rub my eyes again.
Groaning, I rub my eyes again. “That little shit can’t make her happy.”
This makes Hunter chuckle again, out of surprise. “And you can?”
It’s a good question. A girl like that is a total package. Intelligent, obviously gorgeous, funny. That’s not something you’ll find every day. She has the whole world on her shoulders, and there’s no way she’ll settle for what I want. But that’s just it: what the fuckisit that I want?
My heart does funny shit every time I talk to her, I can admit that. But I’ve never been the kind of guy who chases a girl. I have a ton of baggage. My dad fucking hates my guts, my mom’s dead, I’ve never had a girlfriend. And would she even want a guy who has more bruises than I should at my age? Hunter’s voice breaks into my thoughts yet again.
“You guys aren’t a match. And I think you know that; you just won’t accept it.”
“This conversation is pointless. We’ve already agreed to be friends.” Painfully agreed.
“And yet you’re sitting here, staring at her laughing with her boyfriend.” There goes that word again. Suddenly, I’m done talking about it.
“Look, whatever. Is Kris here?” She’ll be good to help take the edge off. Not waiting for his answer, I jump up and search for her. I’m done with this pining bullshit. At least for now.
I thrust into her one last time, and she lets out the loudest moan. I slowly pull out of her as we both pant. We do our usual routine of cleaning up, throwing away used condoms, and dressing up again. Kris decides to break the routine this time.
“It felt good to do that again with you, Larson.” Her husky voice stops me in my tracks.I wish I could say the same. Physically, it felt great as it always does with Kris. But there was nothing emotional connected to it. I give her a small smile as I throw my shirt on. “What happened to us, Larson? We used to speak all the time.”
Closing my eyes, I silently curse myself for seeking her out tonight.
“What do you mean? We talk all the time.”
Her eyebrows shoot up as she puts her hair in a ponytail, the brown waves shimmering in the room light. “I haven’t spoken to you in like a month, Larson.”
Because that’s how long Leia’s been back.
“I don’t understand your point. Are we supposed to talk every day?” This is precisely why I avoid dating.
“Not every day, but I thought we were still friends. ‘Friends with benefits’ is a saying for a reason, Larson.”
She’s making it super hard to continue doing this with her. But I get what she’s saying. I wouldn’t want to only be used for my body either.
“Look, I’m sorry, Kris. It’s just been rough with the hockey schedule. Winning the championship last year kind of put us on lockdown from doing parties like these again so we could focus more. We’ve been doing it more now since Coach is away, and I’ve been acting as Coach.” It’s partly true. I also just don’t want to chase two girls at a time if I’m interested in one more than the other. She gives me a look as if she’s not fully convinced, biting her bottom lip in nervousness. “I have no reason to lie to you, Kristen.”
Saying her full name makes her smile. “I’ve just...missed you. That’s all. And Hunter kind of told me you got involved with this new girl. Freshman, right?”Shit.I’m going to beat Hunter’s ass tomorrow. I’m about to explain, but she cuts me off. “I totally get it. You’reJake fucking Larson. I don’t expect you to be loyal to me. And if you want, you can have two hook-up buddies.” I freeze.What the fuck?
I freeze.What the fuck?“You’re giving me the clear to have sex with her too?”
That’s laughable. Leia would never agree to that if I brought it up to her. The very thought would actually run her away from me altogether. Kris gives me a small smile before nodding her head.
