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“Miss Fallon?” Caleb said as soon as I shut the huge doors behind me. The echo of the wood slamming shut filled the cavernous space.
“Did you know there’s a ghost outside?”
“You mean Friedrich?”
“Younamedhim? That’s like adopting a trash panda. You’re only encouraging him to stick around.”
“His name is Friedrich, and he’s been in that same spot for the last hundred years, waiting for his wife to join him. Sadly, when they were killed on their wedding night, she was turned into a vampire and has never come to find him.”
Pity replaced my fear, and I found myself depressed on his behalf. “Well, damn, now I feel bad for ditching him.”
Something soft shimmered in his eyes. “Don’t worry, he’s doing what he feels he must. We are all ruled by instinct and desire, even if we don’t want to be.”
“Have a lot of experience with that, do you, Padre?”
“A lifetime’s worth. Now, tell me what brings you here in the middle of the night, Miss Fallon.”
I looked around the sanctuary. Pews still filled the space, but instead of a pulpit, a large oak desk loomed at the end of the aisle. “This is where you teach? A church? Isn’t that a bit on the nose?”
“I teach theology.”
He said it so simply like he was telling me it was raining outside. Even so, I couldn’t help but wonder if he merely preferred being surrounded by the trappings of the life he’d intended to lead. Or if the reminder of what he’d lost was yet another way for him to torment himself.
“Fair enough.” I trailed the tip of my index finger over the back of one of the pews. “I guess this does lend your class an air of... authenticity.”
“I do try.”
I’d never been in a Catholic church before, but there was no mistaking the ornate wooden structure situated on the right side of the sanctuary. “A confessional? Really?”
“You’d be surprised how freeing confession is.”
The way he said it gave me pause. “You still confess?”
“I have no confessor to speak to, but I am penitent in my own way. I can only pray that God hears me, damned as I am.” He strode down the aisle, not asking me to come with him, but I followed anyway. “What is weighing so heavily on your heart? I can feel the burden you’re carrying tonight.”
He’d given me the opening I needed, but now that the time was upon me, I found myself suddenly shy. How could I look at him when admitting to the things keeping me awake?
“Can you still hear my confession?”
He stopped, turning so swiftly I had to take several steps back to catch my balance. “You seek the Sacrament of Reconciliation?”
“I’m not Catholic or anything, but if it’s all you chalked it up to be, why not?”
“I can’t offer absolution. You understand that?”
“I don’t care. I just need to talk to someone without them judging me.”
His entire countenance softened, and for the first time, real tenderness shone in his sapphire eyes. “I can give you that.”
His admission showed me a kindness he hadn’t revealed to me before. Instead of fire and brimstone, there was only understanding. For the first time, he wasn’t just my mentor or punisher; he was offering to be my friend. It was... everything I hadn’t realized I’d been hoping for when I blindly made my way through the storm to find him.
Taking my hand, he led me over to the structure and held open the deep purple curtain so I could step inside. I frowned, glancing between the small wooden bench and the kneeler.
“Am I supposed to get on my knees for you again?”
“It’s your choice, but I find it helps with my mindset when I kneel. The discomfort brings with it focus.”
“Knees it is then,” I said with a heavy sigh.
