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Something about his tone told me that wasn’t true, but I could also see how immediately disinterested he seemed. Like somehow, I’d turned him off by answering his question.
“What happened, Caff? I gave you my entire sob story and all I get is a ‘not particularly’? Talk to me, let me be an ear.”
“It was over ten years ago, Zeppelin. It’s not important anymore, and it’s not something I like talking about. I’m not particularly proud of it.” He paused, setting down his fork and tapping the table gently. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Of course.”
“I didn’t realize until you sent me your address that you were working for Sterling. I don’t think it’s my place to tell you what happened between the two of us, but I need to know. Is working for him just a stepping stone to something different? Or do you plan on working for him long-term?”
I was taken aback by the question, but I knew exactly where it was going. “For as long as Charlie needs me. I don’t have any intention to leave.”
“It’s good to be so sure of your decisions,” he said quietly. “But I know Sterling, and he won’t take this well. Are you prepared to handle that if this goes somewhere? Don’t misunderstand me, Zeppelin. I’m not saying I’m not interested, but I’m almost forty years old and I’m extremely busy. I don’t think it’s in either of our best interests to waste time.”
It was in that moment that I knew this was over. We both found each other extremely attractive, would have jumped at the chance to date or fuck each other’s brains out if we were at any other point in our lives, but we weren’t. And simply being attracted wasn’t always enough.
I held out my hand for his, pleased when he took it right away and met my gaze. We both knew this was the end of the line. “I understand. I don’t know how I’d handle it, but I know either way, I wouldn’t leave Charlie. I’d honestly do whatever I had to do to stay.” I knew Sterling would never make me choose, but I also knew without a doubt that it wouldn’t be Caffrey ... and he didn’t deserve to come last.
“I appreciate your honesty more than you know. Maybe we could get coffee or a drink sometime, as friends? Maybe a few roofies?” He chuckled, looking a little more at ease, and I felt myself relax more than expected.
“We tried,” I said with a soft smile. “Hell, we tried three times if our first meet counts... but I don’t think we want to count that one.” We shared a laugh and went back to our plates. “I think the roofie might fuck with the coffee, though, so we’ll do a drink.”
“Fuck, that shouldn’t be funny. That’s really not funny, people do horrible shit with those things and it’s never taken seriously enough.” He shook his head, picking at what was left of his food. “I kind of hate Sterling a little more now, for the record.”
I couldn’t say I didn’t understand, but I knew I was missing too many pieces of the puzzle to voice that just yet. “You really won’t tell me what happened with him? Was it another woman?” I asked.
He shook his head slightly. “He broke the law and I tried and failed to prove it. He’s the only loss I have on my record, so you can understand how that’s a bit of a sore spot.”
I frowned, then tried to keep any sort of accusation out of my words. “Broke the law? And you still believe he did it even after not finding evidence?”
“Yes, I do,” he said honestly. “I had the evidence. I had a witness. And then suddenly, I had nothing at all. What would you think, Zeppelin?”
I’m not a lawyer, nor was I there, so I’m sure I’m not qualified to answer that by a long shot and now I just want to go home.“I don’t know what to say about any of that, Caff.” Not one part of me believed that my uptight, straight-laced boss was secretly a white-collar criminal, which meant that evidence and that witness had to be wrong.
“Don’t worry, I can’t try him again for the same crime. I don’t think I’d try to anyway — he made me look like an asshole. And hell, maybe I was.” The waiter brought our check, and Caffrey took it without question. “Guess we’ll never know.”
“Right.” I watched him pull out his card before speaking again. “Thank you for dinner,” I said sincerely. “It was nice to get out of the house. Your car is beautiful by the way.”
He smiled, clearly proud of it. “Thanks. Took forever to find it, but it was worth the wait. You ready to go?”
“Yeah. Caffrey, I just wanted to thank you for being honest and communicating your needs here. It’s refreshing.”
He flashed me an apologetic smile as he stood to put his coat on and wait for his card. “I was hoping it didn’t come across as rude. Just figured I’d save us both the trouble, especially since it seems like you have a thing for him.”
“What?” I was sure my face gave me away easily. “I don’t — I mean, he’s my employer.” I stood with a blush and slid my bag over my shoulder, but Caffrey reached out to touch my arm softly.
“I’m sorry, Zeppelin. I didn’t mean to accuse, I just know the look. That’s all. Fuck, we really can’t get this right, can we?”
I huffed softly, placing my hand on his and shaking my head. “Apparently not. We’re a mess, aren’t we?”
“Little bit.” He took his Visa back from the waiter and slipped him a tip, then placed his hand gently on the small of my back and led me to the door. “Maybe we’ll have better luck when there aren’t any expectations, yeah? Just a couple of friends with some really inappropriate inside jokes and a topic we’ll never agree on.”
“That sounds right up our alley, actually. Who knows, maybe we’ll get committed together when we talk about roofies in front of the wrong person.”
He grimaced, but the tone on the ride home was light. Once the pressure was off, he made me laugh harder than anyone had in a while, and part of me was a little disappointed when he parked the car outside of my house.
“Can I text you sometimes?” he asked, looking over at me like he wasn’t sure.
“Of course. Any time. If you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here, okay? I had a great time tonight even if you did dump me,” I joked.
