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Chapter Twenty-Eight:
Torment
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Ollie
I didn’t understand how my life had done a one-eighty so quickly. It was a record, even for me, but I kept making the wrong decision. I shouldn’t have been surprised, it was my signature fucking move — but dumping Mia? That was an entirely new level of stupidity, even for me.
The sun was still up but not directly overhead anymore as I hid in the alley by Sunday’s to wait. I felt like a kid being put in detention, but judging by the fire in her gorgeous eyes, it was going to be far worse than that — and I deserved every second.
My ribs hurt, my face hurt, my brain and heart weren’t much better off ... and when I saw her stomping out and scanning our surroundings like she might murder me, I felt a chill. She stopped directly in front of me and crossed her arms, staring up at me like I wasn’t fourteen inches taller than her. “Go on, Oliver. Dump me. Tell me you don’t love me anymore.”
“What? Are you nuts?” I asked, even though that was exactly what I was trying to do. “Of course I love you, how could you think I don’t? This is for you, Mia. You deserve someone fucking stable, and I’ll never be that.” My chest ached, but it was true. I’d always let my emotions get the better of me.
The tears in her eyes made that ache feel more like a break, and I deserved it. “¡Ay bendito! How dare you make that decision for me? That is mine!”
She slapped me in the face with my own feminism, which was probably the only thing that could’ve cleared the fog in my head. I was such a fucking firm believer that men needed to stop making decisions for women, and here I was, thinking I knew what she deserved better than she did. “Mia, that’s not— I didn’t—”
“You did,” she spat, holding onto her arms like she was cold, and the angrier she got, the more her English and Spanish weaved together, but I didn’t have a problem keeping up. “If you think leaving me is what I deserve, then you’re telling me I deserve to have my heart broken. I love you, Oliver. I don’t just say that to people. I don’t just give myself to people — ever.”
I was afraid to say a word. This was my second signature move: saying all the wrong things no matter what, and this wasn’t an exception. “I’m sorry, but you’re really hot when you’re mad.” Godfuckingshitdamnitwhat! “No, wait!” I yelled, holding up my hands in defense. “I didn’t mean that. I mean, I meant it, but I shouldn’t have said it. What I meant to say is that I’m sorry and I love you very much and I’m a big giant idiot who—”
Mia’s narrowed gaze stopped my rambling. “I’m nuts, I’m hot when I’m angry, and you want to dump me. What a great Monday,” she said sarcastically, but the fire in her eyes had dwindled slightly. “Dump me because you don’t love me, not because you want to be some kind of martyr. Say it and I’ll walk away.” But she knew I couldn’t, and when I didn’t, she moved closer. “You’re my man.” Her fist balled in my shirt. “Mine.”
“Yours.” I couldn’t understand why she didn’t want someone better than me. More stable, more reliable. Like an actual grownup and not a child in a grown man’s body. But I didn’t say any of that; I couldn’t. I’d barely been able to muster the courage to tell her any of this in the first place, and I was too selfish to keep pushing now. I couldn’t bear the thought of truly leaving her. “Be gentle with me, I’m fragile,” I mumbled.
“Gentle?” Mia tilted her head and gripped my side a little roughly. “You want to fuck gently, Papí? Or do you want to choke me and forget all about this bullshit world? Because I don’t accept your resignation.”
I fought a wince, glad she hadn’t seen the bruises on my torso yet. Part of me did want to fuck her gently, slowly, to worship every inch of her until she believed me that I’d try to be better. But I knew her and knew that she needed this, so I let my emotions fall away and gripped her throat. “Want me right here, baby?”
Mia gasped, pushing into my palm as her pupils blew before my eyes. “Sí, Papí. Now. Show me you still want me. Show me you didn’t fucking mean it.”
She was whispering now, desperation etched into all her features, and that was all I needed to see. I flipped her around, caging her facing the wall, and leaned in to whisper in her ear. “You think there’s any world where I wouldn’t want you anymore?” I tugged her dress up and pushed her panties down as she tossed her head back against my shoulder. “Any fucking universe where the sight of you wouldn’t get me hard?”
“No sé. You’re the one that dumped me.” I could hear the smile in her voice, the challenge in her tone, and knew I had her.
“Tried,” I corrected, sliding my fingers inside of her to get them wet. “Didn’t seem to take.” I kissed her neck as I pulled my cock out and stroked, then yanked her head back by her hair as I shoved in. “My Mia doesn’t listen very well.”
“¡Cállate la boca!” she rushed out, pushing back for more and I instantly complied, shutting my mouth as I started to move.
Every movement made my ribs ache, especially since I had to bend so awkwardly to kiss her neck and fuck her standing up. It frustrated me to the point that I pulled out to turn her around, then lifted her off her feet and held her up as I guided myself back in. I used that dirty brick wall as leverage to fuck her harder as I stared into those fiery, consuming eyes, and when she came and whispered she loved me, I couldn’t believe I ever tried to leave.
I kissed her hard and whimpered against her lips, torn between the pain in my body and the pleasure in my cock. That line felt like electricity, like heat, like torment ... and I fucking loved it.
“Mia ...”
“Ollie ...” she moaned, pulling me into her neck and hanging onto my shoulders as I fucked her harder. “Come on, baby. Come inside me.”
It hit me like a train and it took all of my concentration not to drop that beautiful, bossy woman, but it was worth it when I felt her clenching around me and squeezing my cock as I came.
“That’s it, Papí.” She rolled for more with her bottom lip between her teeth. “Tell me how much you love this pussy.”
“So fucking much,” I breathed, stilling still buried inside her. “I’m so sorry, baby.”
“Good.” Mia pulled me in to hold me there, her lips placing gentle kisses against my neck as we breathed together. “I’m sorry you’re in pain, do you need me to leave work?”
I shook my head, even though that was exactly what I wanted. “I’ve been enough trouble lately, baby.”
“You haven’t been, only right now. I already told you I’ve been arrested for fighting, I’m not the one that can throw stones here. That dude deserved to get hit and that sucks you got locked up, but don’t let this set you back. You’re doing good things, even if I want to slap you still. Put me down, Ollie. I have to go back to work.”
I did my best to clean her up and helped her fix her uniform, then pulled her in to plant my lips to her forehead. “Can I see you soon?”
“You know where to find me, Oliver. I want to see you every day, I think I’ve showed you where I stand. Go shower and take a nap. You need some real sleep, I know you didn’t get any.” She pulled away and headed for the door, stopping just shy of yanking it open. “And remember my damn phone number.”
A second later, she was gone, leaving me to wish I’d have just stayed home instead of going to that bar. Why any part of me ever thought risking her was worth it, I wasn’t sure ... but there wasn’t anything I wouldn’t do to keep her.
