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I can only stand with my hand covering my mouth as I watch my friend break when he needs to be at his strongest.
“Come on, darling. Take a deep breath. Look at me.” Sebastian breathes with Marcus. His eyes are wide with fear as he stares at Sebastian.
Sebastian keeps soothing him and places Marcus’ hand on his chest. “Breathe with me, baby. Deep in, there you go, let it out. Deep in, and let it out.”
He patiently sits with Marcus until he’s calmed down. All I can do is fight the tears that are threatening to fall.
“Keep breathing,” Sebastian whispers. He takes Marcus’ hand and holds it as he makes sure he’s okay.
“There you go.” Sebastian removes the oxygen and smiles at Marcus. “Don’t get yourself so worked up. You’re in good hands.”
Sebastian starts to pull his hand free and to my surprise, Marcus grabs hold of him.
“Don’t leave. Stay and talk to me. Tell me anything. Just keep my mind busy, or I’ll go insane.”
Sebastian sits on the side of the bed and smiles teasingly.
“You sure you want to give me free reign over the subject?”
Marcus nods as he keeps taking deep breaths.
“Okay, don’t say I didn’t warn you. Let’s see…” Sebastian’s face lights up. “Oh yes, you’re gonna love this one. So, there I was, hiding in the closet cause it wasn’t socially acceptable to be gay. I mean, I was literally in the closet trying on my Mamma’s heels. She had a leopard print pair I really liked. She opened the door and there I was with my leg in the air, trying to force her heels onto my foot.”
Sebastian starts to laugh, and it draws a smile from Marcus.
“Darling, let me tell you my mamma was pissed. Boy, I thought she was going to whoop my ass. She hauled my ass out of the closet and picked up her heels, holding them to her chest.”
A sentimental look softens his smile.
“She was angry because I was trying to get my big feet into her four hundred dollar shoes. She wasn’t angry because I was gay. Even though I had to take the trash out for a week, it’s one of my favorite memories.”
“Have you always known you were gay?” Marcus asks.
“Gay is just a label. I’ve always known I was different from other boys. I wanted to stay home and play with dolls while they played with their cars. I chose to stay home and bake with my mamma while my brothers went fishing with my dad. I’m lucky. My family never treated me differently. My oldest brother would beat up any kid who tried to bully me. When I was confused about my feelings for Ryan, my mamma sat me down and told me a soul doesn’t get to pick its mate. You’re soulmates because you share a soul.”
“Do you believe that?”
“I do, with all my heart. I can’t imagine my life without Ryan.”
“When your mom talked to you about soulmates, was that when you knew Ryan was the one?”
“No, she
just gave me a talking to so I would pull my head out of my ass and go claim my man. When I saw Ryan for the first time, I knew. I knew he was the right one because I kept going back to him. I couldn’t let go of him no matter how I tried to fool myself. Trying to stay apart is like trying to tear a soul in half.”
The door to the room opens, and Leigh comes in followed by another doctor.
“Are you ready to get those fragments out of you?” she asks Marcus while smiling warmly.
Sebastian gets up but doesn’t let go of Marcus’ hand.
“Can he come with? He’s a nurse. Is it allowed?”
The panic and fear rush back into Marcus’ eyes, and I wish I could be the one to hold his hand.
“You don’t have to ask. I’ll be there with you through the whole procedure,” Sebastian assures him.
“It’s time to go, Marcus. Would you like a moment alone with Jaxson?”
