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“You love him?”
I’m not sure I’ve ever fully admitted it to myself before, but I do to Layne. The answer is so simple. So obvious. “Yes. I’m completely in love with him. But I have no idea how he feels about me.”
To my relief, Layne takes me seriously. She frowns and thinks for a minute. “He hasn’t told you?”
“No. He’s never said he loves me or even that he likes me. I’m happy to be with him. Really I am. And I’m not expecting some kind of silly fairy tale. But not knowing how he feels keeps making me… insecure. I can’t just go with it. I’m always questioning everything.”
“Well, that’s perfectly normal. You should be able to feel secure in your relationship, and it’s not silly to want that. Some guys don’t want to blurt out their feelings even if they’re feeling a lot. Travis didn’t want to. It took him getting shot for him to get it out.”
I laugh softly, dryly, at this. “Grant got shot. And he still didn’t say anything.”
“Well, what has he said to you? I mean, about how he feels. Maybe that will give us a clue.”
I blush hotly. I can remember every single thing Grant has ever said to me that even hints at feelings. Word for word. But saying them out loud is different from reliving them over and over again in my mind.
But I make myself begin. “Well, he clarified that things were good between us. He asked if they were good, and I said they were. That was just a couple of weeks ago.”
“Okay. That sounds like a good sign—that he cares about the state of your relationship. What else?”
“He said I’m everything to him.”
“Oh my! He said it just like that. You’re everything to me?”
“Yes. Those exact words. But that was during…”
“Ah.”
“So maybe it doesn’t count.”
“I don’t know.” She pauses to think for a few moments. “Travis means what he says in bed, but I guess some men don’t. Probably depends on the man.”
“Yeah. And he’s said a bunch of other sexy stuff, but that may or may not count.” I take a couple of slow breaths. “He said he wants to be the one who gives me what I need.”
“Nice.” Layne’s eyes are big and wide. “What else?”
“He’s said he wouldn’t have anything left in this world if something happened to me.”
“Okay, seriously? That sounds like a declaration of love. You really don’t think he has feelings for you?”
“I guess he has feelings. I mean, saying all this is making me wonder if I’m worrying for nothing. In bed, I always feel like he... it always feels right.But he’s been acting kind of distant lately otherwise. I only ever see him at night.”
She chews on her bottom lip as she thinks. “And you don’t want to just tell him you love him and wait to see what he says back?”
I shy back slightly at the thought.
“Okay,” she says with another giggle. “I probably wouldn’t be able to do that either. It’s the advice that everyone gives, but most of us can’t really follow. I bet he probably does love you but maybe doesn’t think you feel the same way. So we’ve got to figure out what to do.”
“About what?” The male voice surprises us both. Travis has come back into the apartment with their luggage and their dog.
Layne slants me a look. “Can we tell him? He’ll probably be able to give you better advice than I can. He knows all about being a taciturn man.”
I hesitate. Travis looks silently between Layne and me and then back again. Then finally I nod.
“Okay, great. Travis, you’ve got to help us. Olivia isn’t sure whether the man she loves, loves her back, and we’re trying to figure out what to do to break the stalemate.”
“All right,” he says slowly, pulling up the second chair in the room and lowering his long body into it. “You don’t want to just ask him?”
“She’s nervous to do that,” Layne responds before I have to come up with an excuse. “Isn’t there something you can think of that might kind of push him into it? He acts like he’s into her, but he doesn’t say anything. So she’s not sure if Grant really loves—”
