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Knox won the bull-riding event again. Jana couldn’t say she was surprised, yet, it was thrilling all the same. The lights, the cheering crowd, the thundering bull—and Knox made it all look like a work of art. She’d sat by Barb and Patsy, who were never ones to miss out on any social event in Prosper that included single men. Specifically, cowboys.
“Please come to the dirt dance with us,” Barb said for at least the hundredth time as the crowd filtered out of the stands.
Jana hadn’t confessed to her friends about Knox staying at her place, and the turn of events in their relationship. She didn’t know if she could exactly define it, anyway. He was leaving town tomorrow, and then going on to another rodeo, then another. He didn’t have a permanent home that she knew of. There was still so much they hadn’t even talked about.
Yet… when Knox had climbed up onto that bull and as he was strapping on his grip, he somehow spotted her in the stands. She’d seen his smile and had no doubt it had been just for her. Jana had never experienced such a rush of emotion before. She couldn’t even fully describe it, but she still felt like she hadn’t floated back to earth yet.
“You’re somewhere in outer space, hon,” Barb said. “Haven’t you been sleeping, or something?”
“I’m fine,” Jana said quickly.
“So we could go get something to eat, then come back to the dirt dance,” Barb said. “What do you say, girls?”
“I’m in,” Patsy announced.
But Jana was looking toward the bull-riding pen, where Knox and a couple of the other cowboys had come out to greet fans. Women surrounded them, and Jana couldn’t look away from how they were obviously trying to get Knox’s attention. From this distance, she couldn’t see his eyes beneath his cowboy hat, and she was pretty sure he wasn’t flirting back. Right?
“What are you in the mood to eat?” Barb asked Jana, cutting into her thoughts.
She exhaled and looked at her friend. “I’m not going to the dirt dance, so I’ll just head home.”
“Come on, Jana,” Patsy said, her painted red lips forming a pout. “You’ve skipped out on us the last couple of times.”
“Yeah, she’s right,” Barb cut in. Then her gaze slid to where Knox and the other bull-riders were talking to the women. “You’re crushing on him, aren’t you?”
“What?” Jana said. “No. I’m not crushing on anyone.”
“Knox?” Patsy whispered. “Is that who we’re talking about?”
Barb only nodded, her eyes wide, her brows rising in question.
“Look, I’ve really got to head out.” Jana rose and started down the aisle. “Let me know how the dance goes.”
“Jana, wait,” Barb called out, while Patsy just stared at her.
“Text me,” Jana said. She waved her friends off, then headed down the stands without looking back. The arena dirt was already being cleaned, and people were congregating near the walls, waiting for the dance to begin.
She wanted to talk to Knox, to plow right through those women, but she didn’t want to embarrass herself, either. She’d probably end up waiting in line to talk to him. Was he going to the dirt dance? Her stomach twisted as she thought about the one from years ago, when he’d met Macie.
So it was just better that Jana leave. She was happy that Knox won again, and well, it would be amazing if things progressed with their relationship. But reality was starting to set in. Knox was currently surrounded by admiring women. So nothing had changed on that front. And what were the chances that he really would return to Prosper and want to settle down, with her?
She moved with the crowd leaving the arena, saying hi to a few people that she recognized. But mostly, she stayed focused on her walk back to her SUV. She hated how every approaching truck made her pulse leap in anticipation. Knox would be at the arena awhile yet.
By the time she reached her SUV, her heart felt tight, and her stomach had shrunk to the size of a pebble. She was changing her mind every few seconds. Should she stay? Congratulate Knox around all those people? Should she give him space? It wasn’t like she was truly a part of his life. Yes, they’d kissed, more than once… But who was she to harbor expectations about him? They’d barely reconnected, and now she was falling back into old insecurities. Which, incidentally, had been partly due to Knox.
Most of all, she wondered if he’d stay for the dirt dance. He’d have plenty of women ask him to dance, there was no doubt, and Jana knew she couldn’t watch it. They weren’t an item, or in a relationship, at least nothing official.
So she went home. Got her laptop out, and looked up the incoming emails that had come into the advice column to decide which one to answer. She’d focus on someone else’s problems and love life. Hers had too many unknowns and variables.
Dear Miss Jewel,
My best friend is acting a lot different lately. I think he has a crush on me, and I don’t know how I feel about that. I don’t want to lose my best friend.
Sincerely, Unsure in Corpus Christi
Really, there were two answers. Try a relationship with the best friend, and risk losing the friendship if it didn’t work out. Reject the relationship, and lose the friendship. What were the chances of a happily-ever-after in this situation if they didn’t feel the same about each other?
How did Knox feel about her?
