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Before I can answer, Dean walks out on the porch. He’s dressed in suit pants and a short sleeved button-down, and I think we need to have more court days, because damn.
“Time to go guys,” he says, looking uncomfortable in his clothes.
“This is my favorite day ever,” I say out loud, thinking I was using my inside voice.
“We’ve got different ideas of favorite days,” O says.
“Yeah, if you find other excuses for everyone to dress up, let me know, then that’ll be my new favorite day.”
The hearing takes place behind closed doors. There’s no jury involved or anything. It’s just the judge, the district attorney, O’s attorney, all of us and Celia’s mom.
She looks like the ghost of the woman she was the last time I saw her. Her cheekbones are hollow, her hair looks greyer than it was before. Her eyes keep darting to O, who’s quiet and keeps his eyes down, just like his attorney told him to do.
I don’t think it’s an act on O’s side of things, this is just his response to how this is unfolding. I feel a little queasy myself. My whole reference as to how things work in court is based on movies and books, and if there’s anything I’ve learned in these last few months, it’s that living through movie material is a lot less fun than living it.
“Mister Davids,” the judge says, looking at him over a pair of round glasses, making him look like an owl. O looks up expectantly and looks a little green. “I’ve reviewed everything in the case of the passing of Miss Celia Mansfield. On advice of the district attorney, you are being charged with death by fault, and we’re resolving this without a formal trial. We will review this case today.”
I wait for Celia’s mom to explode, like she did that day at the police station. It doesn’t come. She keeps staring ahead, nothing to be found in her gaze. There’s absolutely no fight left in her, and I wonder if this is what depression looks like.
I don’t care that she didn’t help with the Celia situation, or that she attacked me when we ran into her, I wouldn’t wish this upon anyone. My dad used to tell me that my empathy was both my biggest gift and my biggest curse. Being able to sense everything makes writing a lot easier, but I also always feel everything and that, in my case, can be a lot.
“Now, we’ve all had the same evidence and all have read the same files. Let’s go over it. On the morning of June second of this year, Mister Oliver Davids and Miss Morgan Pike got in the car of Mister Davids, ready to leave for Kinseltown. Before driving off, Miss Celia Davids got into the back seat of the car, threatening Miss Pike by pressing a knife to her throat,” the judge starts, before he goes through all the events of that day leading up to Celia falling to her death in O’s car on Oakman’s Bridge.
“Misters Davids, your lawyer says this was self-defense. Do you care to explain how that is?”
O lifts his eyes to the judge. “I thought the stalking would never end. I could’ve taken her to Kinseltown, but I thought I wouldn’t ever be let go by her. And even if I would manage to get away, she would come back the next time and do it all over again. So I saw no other way out. I thought I wouldn’t be able to get out of the car myself, but at least in that case I knew there was a slight possibility I might survive. With Celia in the back, making her way over with her knife, I knew I had to get into action immediately, because once she had that knife on me, it would all be over. And I wasn’t ready to die. I really didn’t want to. And I was sure it was going to happen. So I aimed for what I thought was a pillar, it never was my intention for the car to fall of the damn bridge. Uh, excuse the cursing, your honor.”
A soft sob comes from Celia’s mom, and I really do feel for her. The judge looks at everyone, first at O, then at Celia’s mom.
“Miss Mansfield, would you like to make your own statement?”
The sobbing continues, her attorney rubbing circles over her back. Once she manages to suck in a big gulp of air, she sits up a little. “No your honor, I just wish that this all wouldn't have happened. But I understand that this… losing my baby… “ She almost starts crying again, her lip quivering, and I feel my own eyes prickle with tears. “It was inevitable. I see that now. Maybe if she would’ve allowed to get more help… Maybe if I made her…”
The statement somehow shoques me. The last time I saw her, she was trying to attack me because she thought it was all my fault. But the loss was so raw back then. I think she’s had time to mourn since then. Maybe see things from a different perspective a little. The judge looks at her with understanding eyes.
“Okay, Mister Davids, if you would please stand up, I will get to a verdict right now. Going over all the files, and the history Miss Mansfield had, I’m going to clear you of all charges.” Looking at Miss Mansfield, he adds, “We’ve had one young person being ripped from life way too soon. Let’s not ruin another in the process. I’m agreeing with the self defense, meaning this ends right here. There are no winners in this case, but I do strongly urge all of you to make the best out of the life you’re given.”
Miss Mansfield is silently crying, while my heart makes a small jump out of relief. He’s cleared of all charges. I try to hold it back though. It’s still her child that died.
When the judge wraps it up, I hurry over to O and cling to him like I’m a koala bear and he’s the best damn eucalyptus tree I’ve ever seen. He’s trembling from what I guess is adrenaline and tension leaving his body, so I squeeze him tighter until the point where I think he’ll be unable to breathe. I kiss his cheek and feel the corner of his mouth pull up.
“It’s over,” I whisper, because somehow speaking up in a courtroom scares the shit out of me.
He nods, but his heart isn’t in it yet. Like he can’t believe it. When I finally let him go out of my koala grip, he turns around and starts making his way to the exit. His eyes dart back to where the judge is seated, the man gives O a reassuring smile and a nod. Yes, he’s really allowed to leave here. That’s the moment his shoulders finally slump down and the tension eases out of him.
“Wait,” Miss Manfield says, her throat thick with emotion. We both turn around, and the grief stricken woman wipes her eyes. “I just wanted to say I’m sorry.” The words are soft, and her voice is shaking a little. “I just never really believed that she would do something bad. I’m sorry I didn’t believe you and I’m sorry I attacked you at the police station.”
Without being able to explain why, I let go of O and make my way over to her. I wrap her in my arms and hug her tight.
“We’re sorry about your loss,” I tell her, and she nods before she starts crying again. O looks at me like he’s about ready to collapse, so I try to find a way to get myself loose from her. I really do feel for her, and I absolutely thought that she could need a hug, but now I’m just looking for a graceful way to get out of here. The DA who sat with her at her table notices my uncomfortableness, and lays a hand on Miss Manfield’s shoulder. She uses the opportunity to cling to him instead of me, and I make my way out.
Once we’re in the hallway, the boys pounce on O and hug him tight, hugging him and congratulating him that it’s over. O seems spent. It’s like all this time being in uncertainty is finally showing now that it’s over. I grab his hand, tangle my fingers through his and hold on tight.
“Let’s go home, I know exactly what you need,” I say while wagging my eyebrows.
O smirks. A dirty smirk that I can feel in my panties.
“You need blankets.”
