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ChapterThirty-Five
Of skunking course.I was about to figure this out before Fabio interrupted me. This is Bella Chortsky—the owner of the sex toy company Belka and the person I’ve been trying to speak with about a sponsorship opportunity.
When Gia first brought her up, it was in the context of Bella being Holly’s new BFF, so it’s not that surprising Holly’s brought her here as her second plus-one.
Except I thought Bella had ghosted me. Her warm smile, however, doesn’t seem to be one a ghoster would give the ghostée.
Realizing that I’m gaping at Bella like an idiot, I leap to my feet and shake her hand. “Lemon. Nice to meet you.”
Bella’s smile widens. “Nice to meet you face to face like this.”
It is? But what about the ghosting?
“It’s odd, actually,” Bella continues. “I feel like I already know you.”
“You do? Why?”
She arches one perfect eyebrow. “All that correspondence on your blog?”
What correspondence? Am I being punked?
Holly rolls her eyes at Bella. “I told you. She doesn’t know that belka means squirrel.”
Bella turns to her BFF. “How could she not? She married a Russian.”
Belkameans squirrel in Russian? Wait a minute… “You’re SquirrelBoner?”
Bella looks sheepish. “I thought you knew. Sorry about that. In case you’re wondering, Boner is the name of my dog. It’s short for Bonaparte.”
Her dog. Sure.
She grins at what she must read on my face. “Anyway, would now be a good time for a talk?”
“Of course. How about there?” I gesture at a clearing where there aren’t any tables.
“Great.” She heads where I suggested. As I follow, I notice the suitcase she’s carrying. It’s covered in tiny hand-drawn, multicolored penises and vaginas.
Huh. I bet my mom would kill me or one of my sisters to have such a piece of luggage.
When we finally have privacy, I can’t help but blurt, “I’m confused. I got a text from you that said we didn’t need to set anything up anymore.”
“Well, yeah.” Bella stands her peculiar suitcase on the grass next to her. “Holly invited me to this event, so I figured we’d talk today. I’m glad I did that. Stalking your blog in the meantime has given me all the info I needed. At this point, I know Belka is interested in collaborating with you. We just need to iron out the details.”
Oh, wow. This is unbelievable. I feel like jumping up and down in joy, but I fight the temptation. It’s better to play it cool since we need to talk money. “What kind of details?”
Skunk. I catch myself bouncing from foot to foot. Hopefully, she’ll think I need to pee.
Bella opens the suitcase, revealing enough dildoes and toys to satisfy an army of enthusiastic nymphomaniacs. I fight a gasp of awe. It’s like the part in Pulp Fiction where a golden light shines out of the pivotal briefcase.
“Glorious, aren’t they.” Bella looks like a proud parent as she gazes at a pair of anal beads. “And since your husband warned me not to wear perfume, I made sure that these are also scent-free.”
I bob my head, still awestruck.
“How about you test each of them and write a sponsored post with your review? Belka will pay five grand for each post.”
Five grand? My eyes bug out, and a squee tries to work itself out of my throat. I swallow it back, but a treacherous grin still blooms on my face.
So much for playing it cool.
